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Original poster

Anyone feel horny all day, but the second the kids go to bed and you are finally alone with your partner you can't be bothered :-/

5 replies

TwoBabas · 14/10/2023 20:29

Just that really!

We have a 3 year old and a one year old. Our sex life has fizzled out to a couple of times a fortnight. Sometimes less. Lots of times of less to be honest.

I have lots of times I feel really horny and plan to act on it when we get some alone together time.

Then when it finally comes down to it.... or we FINALLY get the chance I no longer feel the urge or passion. I just want to sit quietly and rest. Or read. Or scroll. Or watch a film. I'm up for lots of cuddles and other forms of intimacy but sex seems like a chore.

Used to like it in the morning but kids up at 6am so that's stuffed it up a bit. I never wake up naturally at that time. More am flung from deep sleep into sudden mum mode.

I did not used to be this way. Wtf has happened? Is it my age... I'm only 39 but still? Could it be that.

I'm obviously knackered with the two very young children. The youngest is still breastfed.

Is this normal? Anyone relate?

OP posts:
DGConsultant · 14/10/2023 20:53

Hardly surprising with a 3 year old and a 1 year old. It will likely come back. You are likely knackered, horny, but overall stressed and tired.

MarkT · 14/10/2023 22:42

Completely relate to this as a guy. We have young kids, and by the time we get to bed just want some peace and silence for a bit. Also if we do anything they usually wake up and we have to stop!

Im told it get better as they get older... counting down the days! :)

lilkitten · 14/10/2023 23:14

I've been there, mine are 10 and 13 now. I think I was on autopilot as a mum for the first decade, but my sex life got better as they got older and either slept better or just stayed away. Now there's little chance of them leaving their room! It does help for me that I work with my husband from home, so sex is usually in the daytime as nighttime is too knackering

MarkT · 14/10/2023 23:22

lilkitten · 14/10/2023 23:14

I've been there, mine are 10 and 13 now. I think I was on autopilot as a mum for the first decade, but my sex life got better as they got older and either slept better or just stayed away. Now there's little chance of them leaving their room! It does help for me that I work with my husband from home, so sex is usually in the daytime as nighttime is too knackering

re assuring - just 5 years to go for me then! lol 🙄

CatMattress · 17/10/2023 11:30

I dunno - there's a sweet spot in the middle when they're not waking you up in the night so you're not as tired, but they're still going to sleep before you so you can use the evenings. I have a 9 and 11 year old now and I swear to god they're awake later than me and I just cannot focus on anything sexual when I can hear them moving around in the house.

I am now working on getting friends over for sleepovers so we can get rid of our two as a reciprocal arrangement!

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