Do I tell DH I bought a vibrator?

[WhatsMyUsername89]

A friend recommended a vibrator, so I’ve purchased it. It’s not arrived yet But now I feel guilty for getting it on my husband.
do I tell him? I’m not sure how he’d react as he finds lots of things very crude.

our sex life is fine and I have no complaints at all!

am I a bad person for buying one?

No you are not, and yes definitely tell him. Then again, if he's a prude, maybe not. Odd situation to be in. I'd just use and enjoy regardless.

It’s a fait accompli really, I suppose the question is are you going to use it solo or together?

I'd love it, if my partner whispered in my ear, "my new vibrator arrived today".

In my view every woman should own at least one.

As to whether you tell your husband or not, I see no reason to keep it secret. But if you think he will react badly then keep it as your little secret. I must admit to being puzzled by your sex life being "fine" if you think he might find it crude.

For me, vibies have been around longer than any partner and I owe nobody any explanation.

In my view vibrators are best used solo, if a man doesn't like it, oh well.

You are entitled to a bit of self-pleasure just as much as he is.

I think it's nice to share these things with one's partner but you are entitled to privacy too, and if he finds it just say that it feels nice.

I am married and have a very enjoyable sex life, I do also own more than one vibrator. Nothing wrong with having any type of toy in my eyes. My dh isn't put off by it. When a new sex toy is delivered I send dh photos saying look what's arrived. Could you send him a photo and ask if he wants to watch you use it?

When I texted my husband from upstairs in the bed, telling him that I'd had a toy delivered, he replied: 'Feeling fruity are you?' Following my 'yes' response he sent a laughing emoji and did nothing. That was a massive kick in the teeth. We have a terrible relationship and haven't had sex or affection for many years now.

You obviously have a good relationship with your husband so I would encourage him to use it with you sometimes too. I agree with @branchesontheground excellent suggestion.

Following on from my initial comment, I prefer to use a vibie solo (but never say never!). Some overly circumspect men see them as a comment on their ability but the needs are totally different. I start off most days, almost every day with a little buzz first thing, it's me time and all about me. I would not want 1:1 sex at that time. That is not to say I don't enjoy partner sex at other times.

My husband browses for sex toys for me 😁. If it were mine I would definitely tell him, as we happily use them together as he doesn’t see them as a threat at all. If yours won’t like it, and you intend to only use it alone, then there is no reason for him to know.

My df knows I have a couple amd he loves to watch me occasionally
He quite like me to use it around his bits too !

I would tell him as I think on average most men like their girlfriend / wives to use toys and to watch them with them. My current boyfriend is one of them and he knows I have vibrators and dildos and use the regularly. I have had one boyfriend that was not into toys at all, and whilst he knew I had them, I just used them on my own and never mentioned them to him.

If he is likely to see it or find it at some point it's probably better to have the discussion now rather than it been seen as secretive. If you definitely know he will have an issue with it (not that he should in any way), then maybe keep it tucked in your drawer!
Most of my partners have known about my toys, except my first boyfriend, as I got my first vibrator when I was 17 and didn't want anyone else to know I was using one. 😁

Definitely tell him, he will find it one day and that might just damage his confidence keeping it a secret. Just don’t leave the batteries in it or fully charged when you travel abroad 🤣