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Paying for sex

35 replies

Pollypocket11 · 01/07/2023 18:36

I've name changed for this thread.
Do any female mumsnetters know of or have experience of paying a man for sex. I am happily single, I have loads of men who are interested in dating me and quite a few who I have to admit are sexually attractive to me. My problem is that I have come out of very messy divorce and have two children at home with me 95% of the time.
I really miss sex but I feel like I am not emotionally healed enough to embark properly on a new relationship and if I did take up one of the offers I have had to start a sexual relationship it would likely go wrong (because I would sabotage it probably).
Is there a safe and reliable way of paying a man for sex (i.e. someone who does that as a job and is somehow vetted like an escort etc but a total strangers so it is entirely no strings attached apart from the agreed price for me to pay). Safety (i.e. I enjoy it but never have to see him again) and me being sexually attacted are the main things from my side.

OP posts:
Augustus40 · 04/08/2023 13:26

It is free sex but men up for it.

SexySmile · 06/05/2024 04:30

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BigPussyEnergy · 06/05/2024 22:41

Not being funny, but if you haven’t tried an online dating site you’re probably getting the wrong end of the stick. They are not populated with great guys just desperate to get into a relationship with someone they feel chemistry with. More likely is that the men you meet will ghost you before you even meet, you’ll turn up and they won’t look anything like their pics so you won’t want sex at all or you’ll meet someone you like and have great sex then they go cold and ghost you. Don't worry so much about them falling for you and wanting more, tbh that’s not an issue most of us have faced!

RedQuail · 07/05/2024 12:17

If you want no strings attached sex and with someone you don't know.

Then definitely you want a male escort.

Google and find a reputable escort agency and one where there are reviews etc and you know are genuine and then look through them and see which takes your fancy and go for it and enjoy!

myNewName21 · 07/05/2024 13:38

RedQuail · 07/05/2024 12:17

If you want no strings attached sex and with someone you don't know.

Then definitely you want a male escort.

Google and find a reputable escort agency and one where there are reviews etc and you know are genuine and then look through them and see which takes your fancy and go for it and enjoy!

How would you feel if someone ( male or female) was asking about a female escort?

RedQuail · 07/05/2024 13:43

myNewName21 · 07/05/2024 13:38

How would you feel if someone ( male or female) was asking about a female escort?

I would say exactly the same thing. There are escort agencies out there for men and women (straight or gay). Nothing against them and I don't see why that is a problem. OP has already said about paying for sex and wants no strings attached sex with someone she doesn't know.

I thought this seemed like a safer option that just meeting someone off the internet on tinder or something.

KillingEevee · 10/05/2024 18:17

Can I offer you my husband?!?! We’re in a very happy non-monogamous relationship, I have a girlfriend and would love for him to have a FWB, but it’s not that easy for him to find someone who is happy with our setup.

HuskerD · 11/05/2024 10:17

I did some M escorting work a while ago. I had 4 regular clients, all in their 40/50s. The work dried up with the birth of the internet age as people found it easy to find hook-ups they didn’t need to pay for.

we had a lot of safety measures and boundaries well established which made everything work well for each other. I guess that was the only advantage to casual Tinder hookups but if that’s all you want you will be able to find that without paying

Manymoonsagoo · 15/05/2024 07:23

i did this about ten years ago, and I have complex emotions about it now (and have NCd for obvious reasons here).

In was 30, a year single and in a very busy job they really left me no time or energy or money for dating. but the urges were there, and even though i masturbated occasionally when they struck, I wanted a man. The thought of paying was a turn on in itself, and ridiculously I thought that if they were ‘professional’ sex workers they’d somehow be amazing. Like they’d got a degree in it or something!

I got some back pay and decided to treat myself to an escort. The thought of it was, and in some ways still is, a turn on, and in a way sort of made it worth it. But the experience itself was not great. Looking back, it was absurdly expensive and there was absolutely nothing beyond the purely mechanical act. It wasn’t the earth shattering erotic experience I wanted. I was too nervous, too conflicted, and it was more awkward than anything.

But it’s strange because despite that I often don’t regret it. I have thought about it a lot since and am still conflicted. I must admit that when I masturbate now (which isn’t often) I sometimes think of it. Not so much the sex itself as the preparation and my own ‘naughty’ behaviour in seeking it out. Maybe that was the thrill I was seeking. It’s brought me much more joy before and afterwards than it did on the night.

Anyway, I don’t judge. Everyone has their own needs and desires. I wouldn’t do it again, even though sometimes o think about it as an erotic thrill. For me, sex is only at its best with someone I have a mental connection with. And nowadays it’s probably even easier than it was then to meet someone quickly and for free.

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