Never orgasmed

[SophieD1987]

I have been married for 9 years and have never had an orgasm during sex. I remember orgasming once during masturbation as a teenager.

Since using Yes! Lubrication and moisturiser I no longer find sex painful at least ☺️.

I’ve ordered one of the rose sex toys to see if that helps (really hope so)….

Any other thoughts on how to get to orgasm with hubby - is it just that we aren’t doing enough foreplay?

Lots of women don't orgasm through intercourse and that's normal for them. I don't think you can expect him to make you orgasm if you don't know what works for you. If you've only masturbated once in your life and had one
orgasm, maybe you could masturbate more, with or without toys. And once you know what works for you, you could work on it with your husband.

I'm guessing you were both very very innocent coming into this marriage?
The fact that your husband has not asked about your pleasure & the need for lube would suggest a lack of foreplay and build up to PIV sex.

I met my current partner twenty years ago when she was in her mid-thirties. She had never had an orgasm, either through masturbation, or with a partner. This was as a result of a strict Catholic upbringing in the Philippines.

It wasn't long before she orgasmed and she now enjoys multiple orgasms when we use toys. She still cannot bring herself to masturbate, but compared to where she was, she has made an amazing journey.

A full sex life can be achieved, but it is going to be more difficult when neither of you is experienced. Where there's a will, there's a way and you seem to have the desire to get there.

Best wishes.

@SophieD1987 Not all women can come through penetration alone, though you should be able to come with his fingers and tongue. Teach him what you like, show him what works for you specifically, variety, different positions, get him to experiment with different movements during PIV, pace, get him to pay attention to your clit whilst inside you, different thrusts, shallow and deep, and fundamentally have fun trying. Sex should be a right laugh, after all.

I think you would find it useful to read ‘Mind The Gap’ by Dr Karen Gurney.