Ok, so basically been together a few years and had crazy wild passionate and varied sexual experience. But for me, at the heart of it, is our desire for each other. Knowing he wants me, crazy for me, thinking of me. And we had that, and it was a massive turn on. I only want him and have sexual desire for him. A couple of years ago he wanted to explore fantasies and we did, roleplay and other stuff. His biggest fantasy is other women, me talking about them, watching porn etc. we are at a distance so about 50% of our sex life is on the phone. The problem is when discussing it back then I said I was worried it would take over. I prefer stuff like that to be in a box, take it out sometimes. It’s basically taken over. Every time I get horny he starts role playing talking about other women. I was so open to all of it, and have enjoyed it all with him, but it’s starting to piss me off that he can’t just focus on me and on us. I send him pictures tel him how much I want him. I get the same back, says I’m sexy, loves my pictures etc etc but seems the cherry on the cake for him is, let’s start talking about other women, send me some pictures of women, let’s watch porn etc. it’s evident to me that that’s really a good shag for him. Although he says the right things and makes me feel I’m the only one he loves, says I’m beautiful and he likes my body etc, it’s not really enhancing anything anymore, I’m starting to feel undesired. If it was 50% of the time that would be great, but I go to loads of effort to give him full on kink and he doesn’t make the effort to plan anything for me that’s just us. We’ve discussed it in the past and he’s said I’m not going with the flow, so last six months I’ve just let it go how it goes. I’m starting to feel like I can’t be arsed to have sex anymore. I love sex, and I love him, and I crave and desire closeness and to feel his full desire for me as US. Not as two characters, and not with talk or images of other women. I’ve realised I’m losing my will to engage even though I’m very sexually attracted to him. If I bring it up again it’s so black and white to him that he’ll say I’m not giving willingly and act like I am banning it. That’s not the case, I do enjoy those times with him, just want balance. When we’ve done something like that, I expect the next time or at least a couple times later for him to give me all I want with it, with no mention of other naked women. By nature I am monogamous, straight, and sex is about love to me. He’s so crazy about me in all ways showing so much attention, but in my head I’m always thinking, it’s because I give all he wants. What I want is balance, but I don’t want to hurt him or make him feel like he’s not satisfying me, or give the impression I don’t want to explore what makes him happy. I just want him to want that, to want us.