BF and Porn in a fairly new relationship

[Jane881]

I met my partner around 16 months ago, we live about 30 miles away so only see each other once /twice a week but I'd say we're close in the sense were always in contact.

We've been so happy together. Sex is amazing when we see each other. We've just been on our first holiday abroad together and we were searching the net on his phone which came up Pornhub in the search/browser. We'd had a drink and I didn't make a big deal of it. He didn't seem to think anything of it but was clearly a bit embarrassed.

I didn't think anything of it at the time, I've looked on it myself before and I told him that. But now.... I'm getting a bit insecure and questioning is this normal so early on into a relationship / in a relationship. I don't think my ex of 9 years watched it or certainly didn't mention it.

I'm also mindful we don't live together / see each other that often to have sex
What would you think? Am I overreacting? 😬

I’d say you’re overreacting. I also think you’re being naive to think your ex didn’t watch porn, most men do and a lot of women do as well.

I think you’re over reacting too. My most recent boyfriend is a big porn watcher. He had been single for 5yrs after his ex wife left and he has the kids 100% so not much chance to get out so guess he turned to porn (or maybe he had always watched it). We watched some porn together a couple of times too which was fun. Many men watch porn and I’d rather know about it than it be a big secret. I didn’t feel insecure at all about his porn viewing, I mean he’s the one who commented once when he told me to choose one whilst he went to the toilet and then commented I’d chosen the man with the biggest penis (as his is pretty average I’d say)!!

If it is bothering you a lot, and it clearly is, mention it to him. If he’s only seeing you twice a week or less he obviously has times he’s horny and needs a release. Porn is just a way for people to masturbate easier / better. I don’t think men watch it and think her body is gorgeous / I’d rather have sex with her than just partner etc if that’s what bothers you.

Don't over react it's fairly common. If you approach this correctly it will allow him to openly talk to you about his use without embarrassment then any concerns or anxious feelings can be easily dealt with to appease each of you.
Men tend to need visual stimulation during masturbation so in your periods apart his behaviour could be classed as quite normal depending on the genre he's watching.

Don’t let this become an issue. His porn use in his own private space is just that: private. He can watch it and also want/need/crave sex with you.

My previous partner and I.watched some together. I found it quite funny,although some of it was arousing. I then got him.to.listen to some audio porn. It would not bother me