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Jerk off instructions

10 replies

samantha0709 · 07/04/2023 20:32

New(ish) partner.
Found out his preferred porn is JOI.

I'd like to bring this in to the bedroom.

He had previously explained to me that being teased is his big turn on. I didn't really know what it meant so just sort of carried on with what I usually sort of do and didn't really read too much in to it. Time to change that.

But how do I incorporate these things? What sort of instructions should I give him and is this part of 'tease'?

OP posts:
samantha0709 · 07/04/2023 20:33

I mean give instructions myself, not bring the porn into the bedroom.

Ideas appreciated if anyone's got any

OP posts:
Anxiodogo · 07/04/2023 20:48

Watch some and see how they do it?
Tell them when they can come and when they can't..... I think

liveforsaturday · 08/04/2023 12:36

Tried this with a partner once who really wanted to. It was a bit awkward at first but once we’d relaxed into was very good. Being relaxed is the key.

There is also female versions out there, I’d definitely check them out as well to understand what’s it like being the one under instruction!

Enjoy! X

Estherpologist · 09/04/2023 11:08

Does he know you know what porn he likes? If not tread carefully: it might undermine the trust if he thinks you've been snooping through his browser history.

That said, if he likes being teased and JOI, maybe he is a bit sub, and being (playfully) scolded might work for him. And you probably won't go far wrong if you tell him what to do whilst you stay dressed and sit out of his reach.

Catullus5 · 10/04/2023 10:38

He wants you to take control.

Also, masturbation is a bit shameful among men, and what you describe is a way of affirming it. So that might give you inspiration about what to say.

Rockard10 · 17/04/2023 14:01

Have you ever tried mutual masturbation together. Side by side is good but facing each other is more erotic, you need to be comfortable with this and you can then give instructions to each other

MrEssAgain · 17/04/2023 15:19

So from my POV being 'teased' is all about 'the thrill of the slow reveal' - which means he will get very excited with a long and slow build up to sex.

You don't have to be together - in fact it works best with some nice sexting.
This just helps you both connect with each other sexually on a deeper level.
This stuff often works well at the start of a sexual relationship but can easily taper off more long term.

Men get aroused very easily from visual stimuli. It can be something quite innocent that can really him going. Just telling him that you desire him and are thinking about sex ('naughty thoughts') can be a real turn on.

Telling him what you want to do later on that day or what you're wearing there and then also works massively.

Even stuff like "I'm wearing that lacy bra today" via text is a great message to receive during the day. Build up and anticipation really sharpens the appetite. Big time.

A series of messages of a lightly sexual nature will work well.

That will certainly get his heart racing and you may find you will both open up about your desires messaging this way. Sometime it's easier to type it then say what you want in person.

I used to sext during the work day (with my now wife) and we'd be both highly up for it by the end of the day!

When you are at home, then wearing lingerie more around the house is a huge win. Letting him see what is underneath is massive. This works when out also - just a quick flash of a stocking top, or bra strap is enough to really whet his appetite and him knowing it's for him is very hot.

Now, when it comes to JOI specifically, I think asking him to do it whilst you watch would be great. Make him wait a bit and slowly tease him by undressing slowly. Take him right to the edge. It might sound odd reading this but trust me, it can be incredibly erotic and lead to mind blowing orgasms for both of you.

Myotherusernamewastakenagain · 18/04/2023 00:50

Probably not the right forum for it but I'll ask anyway.

Do people see JOI as an acceptable alternative to traditional porn where the women are generally viewed as exploited?

samantha0709 · 18/04/2023 18:28

*Probably not the right forum for it but I'll ask anyway.

Do people see JOI as an acceptable alternative to traditional porn where the women are generally viewed as exploited?*

I have no problem with it personally. It seems a lot tamer somehow and doesn't seem to involve men. Although Ive only watched a handful of clips.

OP posts:
Myotherusernamewastakenagain · 18/04/2023 23:18

samantha0709 · 18/04/2023 18:28

*Probably not the right forum for it but I'll ask anyway.

Do people see JOI as an acceptable alternative to traditional porn where the women are generally viewed as exploited?*

I have no problem with it personally. It seems a lot tamer somehow and doesn't seem to involve men. Although Ive only watched a handful of clips.

I haven't used "traditional" porn to get off for a few years as it was wasting too much of my time
but I do now occasionally watch JOI.

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