Sex after birth.

[supertrooper100]

Can I ask how long it took to be sexually active after giving birth?

I had a traumatic second birth 10 months ago but still not feeling ready really.

We've sort of DTD once and it was not enjoyable and was more of a case of ticking the box.

My downstairs area still doesn't feel normal and I'm worried I'll never have proper sex again. I have a hospital appointment for my downstairs area to be examined in July but it keeps getting cancelled and rebooked.
I'm also aware my husband has needs but there is 100% no pressure from him on this subject.

Have you tried masturbating by yourself?

No. Do you think this could help?

I would try slowly.

Traumatic birth with my first (lots of stitches!) and it took ages to feel normal. Slow and gentle is good. It will return to normal, don't worry.

It was a long journey. Like you I had a hard time, lots of stitches and psychological trauma. At 6 months we had sex’ and to be blunt it was the saddest fuck of my life. I was almost crying as I was so scared it would hurt, my body image was appalling-I genuinely felt mutilated by the delivery. I wish I had sought counselling.

We kept our intimacy going with hugs and loving touches, my partner never tried to rush me either, (good men don’t!!) he believed we’d get back to us! And we did!

I hope you get your hospital appointment soon, it will help to reassure you.

It took myself and DW a year and a bit each time. Communication is the key. Please don’t put yourself under any pressure especially after a traumatic birth.

you need to enjoy some relaxed time by yourself. no one else there no pressure. hot bath then explore and try masturbating. will make you more comfortable and relaxed with it. and by nice at the same time :)

It's different for each woman and each birth really. I had a 2nd degree tear which healed quickly, still took us about 3 months. Didn't feel right at first, but it got better and better.

Agree that masturbating might help re-familiarise yourself with yourself! Good luck, you'll get there I'm sure.

Massage in bio oil.

Hope you are doing well?

I found similar and I didn’t even have a traumatic birth. Listen to Jay Shetty’s podcast on diary of a CEO. Take sex off the cards completely. He says sex is just a biproduct of having a good connection and it’s so true. You will build back up to it but you have to feel physically ready and want to again. Try being close with your partner in other ways in the meantime until you are

It's when your comfortable. But your don't have to go inside to have fun, so can still enjoy time with partner if that's what you like. X