3rd date help, possibly sex? Staying over his…

[velvetcandy]

I need some advice!! The guy I’m dating has asked me to stay over his house on Saturday, I’ve never stayed at a guys place arranged it’s always been a hook up thing. Do you take overnight stuff and what do you wear to bed? Just underwear? Or shall I bring a oversized T-shirt to wear to bed? I don’t know what to do!! Also if a guy asks you to stay it means sex right? I’m such a novice please help

In this situation I used to take a big handbag but not a massive overnight bag as I didn’t want to look like I was camping out!

I’d take a few bits: toothbrush, hairbrush, makeup wipes and makeup just in case. Deodorant and a flannel. Some fresh undies and maybe a clean too (to wear with eg same jeans the next morning). Should all fit it your handbag (appreciate I’m talking a big handbag here haha).

I’d just wear underwear to bed.

Enjoy ;)

Ps I’m sure you’ve thought of this but make sure you give a trusted friend his address so they know where you are. Just to be safe.

*Clean top

Thank you @JupiterFortified

Give afew people the address where you are staying and the guys name

I would take an overnight bag, the same if i was staying elsewhere
I would wear whatever i normally do, to bed
If they come off, then they come off 😀

I did this a few weeks back and went with a vest and knickers for bed, hairbrush and small wash kit and clean knickers and t-shirt for the next day. Yea he has invited you with the HOPE of sex but if he is a decent guy he won’t be unkind or angry if you decline.

Do you want to stay over? If you’re unsure arrange something else. Have sex, don’t have sex, but I’ve never understood the unwritten third date sexpectation.

I stayed overnight the 3rd date with my current bf but he didn’t ask me to stay in advance, but I knew I’d end up staying and I drove over so left my morning stuff in the car. I didn’t take anything to sleep in as knew if I was staying in his bed I wouldn’t be wearing anything! I am not keen on sleeping naked really, but in a new relationship I will. He did offer me the kids beds if I didn’t want to stay in his (bless him) but of course I declined. It had been 5wk by that point and we had both been single for a while so were very keen to have sex. It didn’t disappoint either! I was super nervous, and so was he. I was glad to get that first shag over and done with as it’s a bit embarrassing isn’t it?!

Have you been to his place? I would want to see his home first. The way he lives would be a deciding factor as to whether i wanted to stay or not.

When in that situation, I take clean clothes for the next day in an overnight rucksack. I usually sleep naked so I wouldn't take anything to sleep in, but that is down to how comfortable you are. I always take a lightweight silky dressing gown for the morning.

Belt and braces; put some condoms in your bag just in case.

As others have said let others know where you are and when you leave.

Finally, don't anything you don't want to do.

Enjoy yourself.

Variations on this post come up so much.....

My current bf stayed at mine although not overly planned after 4th time meeting. I wore normal pj's. I just wanted to be comfortable and figured if he didn't like me in normal clothes then he isn't the one for me. I hate sleeping naked. It's been 4 months now so he obvs wasn't put off!

If you said you didn't want to stay over, what would happen?
It sounds like you'd prefer to slow it down.
If you think the fledgling connection would not survive then don't go on a date that is a stay over date.

To add to my earlier comments, the first time l have sex with someone, I prefer to go home afterwards rather than spend the night with them.