Dh watching porn

[Autumnalflower]

I went to browse something on dh phone today & as I went onto safari it was on private & a porn site was open & a blank screen. I stupidly said oh why’s it on private and he quickly said oh let me have a look. His reply was it must have Gone on private with the vpn - it does that!

now I’m not stupid & really don’t believe that! It’s shocked me & I haven’t approached it with him that I saw the porn site!

I don’t know how I feel about it, am I overreacting?

He's a man, its the internet. Pretty sure its what the internet was invented for. Mumsnet was a long way down the list.

Assuming this is standard porn it basically it depends on if it's impacting your relationship.

It would not bother me unless I felt it was affecting my relationship. Perhaps u could watch it together? Uiu could get him to listen yo some audio porn perhaps. Will show how women tend to be less visual than men.

Hey,

I personally don't have an issue with my partner watching porn, whatever floats his boat. However, it's common to feel uncomfortable when you find out about it. If you're curious, ask him about it, but he may feel embarrassed and become defensive about it. So approach it gently and in a non judgemental manner, as he may be more open and honest if he feels 'safe' talking about it.

I would only have an issue if it was weird porn or if he was no longer paying attention to me, in favour of porn.

X

It's really not a big thing these days as many men (perhaps most) and women watch porn. I probably watch it more than my boyfriend now. If he is not paying you attention then it is a problem but if there is no problem there then I wouldn't worry about it at all.

Thank you for all your replies. I haven’t had the courage to ask him, I really don’t even know how to bring it up. I think that day when I saw it I should have said something because now he’s probably going to deny it or say it was a pop up etc. We’ve never had the chat of porn. Seems like a lot of people are okay with it, although I still am not. I’ll see how to bring it up in next few days and see what he says.

What do you want to come of the conversation?
How well do you both deal with conflict?
How strong is the relationship and do you have a healthy sex life?
What is it about him watching porn that you find challenging?

FWIW I agree with @Chrissy1986
Good luck. ❤️