I think I'm too loud

[pitcherscat]

As the title says really, I think I'm too loud when I have sex! I've always enjoyed sex with DH, but since doing one of those pelvic floor and core exercise programs after having our kids it's better than ever. I start out fairly quiet, but as things go on and sensations get heightened I just seem to forget myself and get louder and louder. When I orgasm I can be really noisy, but at the time I'm not really aware of it at all. It's only afterwards I remember we're in a terraced, and if I can hear my neighbours hoovering they can almost certainly hear me. Then I feel really embarrassed! I've read loads of threads on here (Mumsnet in general, not necessarily this section) where people are complaining about their neighbours having sex, I'm just waiting for the day when I recognise myself!

I know I can be quiet. We went to a holiday cottage with some friends and I barely made a sound at all, as I knew they'd be able to hear me. However when I'm at home I just let go. Is anyone else like this? What are your tips for being quiet? Should I even try to be quiet, or should I just enjoy sex with wild abandon in my own home?

In my view, don't try and be quiet.

My wife is quiet throughout sex. Totally silent when she orgasms and it is a source of great sadness for me.

Totally letting go is a great way for your husband to experience your passion for him.

if you make your neighbour’s jealous, they will also have to step it up !

Have kids, then you have no choice but to do it quiet.

We have kids in the house and I wouldn’t want them to hear me orgasming when we do have sex so I keep it down to an acceptable level but one where my DH still knows that I’m enjoying myself. We are also semi-detached so I also wouldn’t want our neighbours to hear us on a regular basis. I don’t think you have to make a lot of noise to show you’re enjoying it and if you’re able to keep the noise down whilst on holiday then surely you’re able to keep it down at home. It also depends whether you feel you should be quiet in your own home, if you’re comfortable with your kids and neighbours hearing then the answer would be to carry on as you are.

I remember hearing my parents ts all the damn time as kids and it was horrendous. Just so embarrassing. I felt so ashamed.

They've studied the female noise factor and it is really unnecessary to make lots of noise. It's just showboating basically and derived from social training that this is how you show you're enjoying yourself. Put it this way, when you masturbate to you loudly cum? Doubt it.

Sure noise to an extent is nice, but lots of it is unnecessary.

Don’t you have kids in the house?

Absolutely grim if they can hear you.

Thanks for the responses, my first Mumsnet "absolutely grim", feel properly inducted now. We do have kids yes, they're both only young and will sleep through anything. We had a thunderstorm the other night that was much louder than me and neither of them even stirred. I know I can be quieter, as I said I was on holiday, but I had to think about it the whole time. I expect one day it will be like that with the kids as well, I wouldn't want them to hear, especially at an age when they know what's going on. The responses I've had here have sort of made me feel that I may as well carry on as I am for now. I've probably only got a short slice of time where I can really let myself go, before I have to start thinking about being quiet because my kids are older/not as heavy sleepers!

Can you tell me what pelvic floor program you've been doing please?

@floppybit Sure it's called MUTU. I had to pay for it but it's been worth it for me. I haven't done it as quickly as they go through it, it's a 12-week program but will have taken me more than double that by the time I've finished.

We moved to a detached house because of sex noise. It happens.

Hilarious. You can’t have had very good sex if you truly believe that.