Questioning my sexaulity in an LTR.

[Nicolelinda96]

Long story short, I'm a 26yo woman in a relationship with a 31yo man for about 3m5 years. We share a house and have an 8 week old daughter, who is our absolute world. I know I love him deeply, he is my best friend and I feel completely safe with him. However, I came out as bisexual about 4 years ago. I've always known I've been attracted to women, more so than men.

I don't particularly enjoy having sex with my partner and it usually feels forced and for his benefit. Lately I've been finding myself on the lesbian side of social media and finding myself getting butterflies, getting turned on my women I don't even know. I guess I've always thought that sex with men is often mediocre and something women often just get on with, so that's why I didn't really even think about my sexuality for a while. I love my partner and want to raise our little family with him, but my mind keeps going back to how exciting and liberating dating and sleeping with women might be. It feels like this colourful unexplored world to me that part of me is afraid of missing out on. Guess this is largely just word vomit, but hey ho.

Also, I have never led my partner on. I love him very much and do find him attractive.

Hi OP,
I was previously in your situation - openly bisexual, in a ltr with a man, the father of my child, and having lustful thoughts about being with another woman which wouldn’t go away. My story is long, it took years to get from there to here, but I’m now divorced and 18 months into a relationship with a woman and very happy!
I’ve been lucky to find a wonderful woman with whom I have a brilliant connection and who also had a similar situation, in that she had a family and was married to a man before.
I never knew sex could be like what we have. It has been mind blowing for both of us! We lose count of how many orgasms we have, it can just go on and on, only stopping because of families, work and needing to sleep!
I don’t want to encourage you to end your relationship, but I want you to know that I totally understand where you are right now and how you’re feeling. Do you feel you could be honest with your partner? Tell him how you’re feeling?
Check out the podcast ‘lesbian chronicles’, it’s American, but the two ladies are amazing and the beginning episodes might be helpful and informative.