First time sex - was it me?!

[Namechange85]

Looking for some opinions here and have name changed as I am really embarrassed.

I've been messaging a guy for around a month and we met up over the weekend. Sex wasn't on the cards as it was a bit of a party with a large group of people, his kids were around, and we were a way off doing that (so I thought!).

Anyway we did end up having sex, but he didn't cum. I am now thinking I am either rubbish (it has been a long, long time for me since I was last intimate with anyone) or he just doesn't find me attractive.

The situation wasn't ideal, he was really worried about the children getting up and catching us and I won't go into detail but the place we were didn't make it very easy to get into position so to speak!

Should I be worried?? If he didn't cum the first time we did it, I feel it doesn't hold out much hope for the future!

Had he been drinking?
Maybe he was tired ?

I think you're overthinking here. @notlongtoo is spot on. Sounds like a stressful situation, all sorts of reasons why he might not have cum. Very much doubt it had anything to with him not being attracted to you.

Don't think you have anything to be embarrassed about at all. Hopefully you can arrange a more relaxed situation for the next time - should be a lot more pleasurable for both of you.

Thank you, yes I suppose it wasn't the most relaxing of situations watching out for the kids!!!

We'd been drinking for hours and yes he was really tired as he's been quite ill recently.

I have never once had an orgasm during penetrative sex. So no I didn't either but that's completely normal for me sadly.

I had sex with a new boyfriend 2 months ago. Even though conditions were all good and we both didn't cum. We both hadn't been with people for ages before that. We are new to each other and were just a bit nervous. I would say his child worries plus awkward position could well have been a factor. Defo nothing to worry about!

You're overthinking it and it's nothing to do with you. I would rather be praised for my self control and staying power than be a disappointing shag. Just enjoy - it'll happen at some point.

I really wouldn’t worry, just forget about it and try again when sober and no kids about

It can take a bit of time to get in the groove with a new partner is one thing. Also, orgasms don't always happen for a range of reasons. Stop focussing on orgasms and focus on pleasure.

Thanks all.
That's put my mind at rest a bit that it's not me!!
I think the positioning was terrible and I've actually been quite sore since!! Sorry TMI! So it'll be left a little while before trying again.

It could have been down to nerves, inexperience, stress, drink, anything. It's unlikely it was anything to do with you. I think if it happens again then there may be a problem but for the first time I don't think you need to worry just yet.