New relationship issues - 0 sex drive

[lifesabeach5380]

I've started a new relationship with a guy I am crazy about.
We haven't had sex yet but he has revealed that he has zero sex drive - yet he wants to have sex with me.

He also mentioned that he can't cum, whether that's sex & masturbation or just sex, I'm not sure.

I do wonder if anxiety plays an issue with both of these to be honest.

Has anyone had a partner with similar problems & turned it around as such?

Wow. Well he's been honest with you but it's a new relationship. I appreciate that you have feelings for him but assuming that you value a good sex life you will need to have a real think about this before you get too heavily involved.

How old is he?

Early 40's

See if you can get him to have his testosterone levels checked. Low T often shows up in men at that age and it's surprisingly common. It happened to my DH at 46. If that's it, it's not good for his cardiovascular health, so there are consequences beyond the loss of libido.

I'll keep that in mind to discuss with him

Good. By the way, when my DH went on HRT he was right as rain in two days. It was pretty remarkable.

One other possibility, loss of libido and inability to orgasm are common side effects of some anti-depressant medications. It can usually be mitigated by lowering the dose or switching to a different medication with fewer sexual side effects. If you can get him to see his doctor for the T test, any medications he's taking should be reviewed as possible causes.

Good luck. I suspect this can be fixed if there's a medical cause.

I dated a man like this a few years ago, mid forties. I didn't like him enough to work through it so ended it.

Testosterone tests are about 50 odd if you want to do it at home

Big driver of how someone responds in that department. Better exercise, weights, diet, possible supplements can help if no anti depression meds involved etc