Zero sex!

[C4SKI]

So we have a 2 year old and an almost 1 year old and I’m pretty sure we’ve only had sex about 4-5 times in those last few years. I literally have zero interest. I thought it was due to becoming a parent and two fairly close in age but I think it’s more that my partner can be verbally abusive and it makes me feel like I never want to have sex with him again! How normal is it to feel like this after having babies? We’ve slept in different rooms since I was first pregnant and now little one is going into their own room he’s expecting us to share again but the thought repulses me. How can I be intimate with someone who regularly comments on my body or puts me down in other ways. How can I move forward, it feels like we’re just room mates!

If he is abusive then you move forward by leaving him and getting on with the rest of your life, ideally.

But, I do think with two small children it is very normal to have a reduced sex drive. It is exhausting! And also quite normal to enjoy sleeping in separate rooms. I am early 30s and my H sleeps separately, we still have an active sex life.

So it sounds like 3 separate issues.

If you don't enjoy his company and you feel that he is not treating you right, consider getting some help to leave.

Agree with @Kitten2. You need to think about leaving that relationship. If your partner is putting you down and making you feel bad about yourself and being verbally abusive, you really need to end it. No wonder you don't want to share a bed with him, let alone have sex.

I absolutely know it's easier said than done, but please don't let your kids grow up thinking it's normal or acceptable for their father to behave that way towards their mother. It will screw them up. I'm sorry; I know that sounds harsh, but it really will. I wish you the best of luck.