Page 2 | Men - are you ever disappointed or turned off by a woman's less than perfect body?

Aliceclara · 2021-07-22T15:59:02+00:00

Asking all men: as a woman I'm incredibly hard on myself, comparing my body to the perfect ones I see on social media/tv/magazines etc. I can never measure up, and I don't think I'm alone in this. What do you really think when we take our clothes off to reveal lumps and bumps, stretch marks, cellulite, less than perfect breasts? I'm in my fifties and I have a pretty good figure for my age but I despair when I see how women's bodies are portrayed. It's hard to feel beautiful these days.

DillonPanthersTexas · 23/07/2021 18:23

I can't speak for all men but certainly from my peer group there is a level of realism insofar expectations as to what an older women looks like naked. We (men) are all too aware of our receding hairlines, love handles, wrinkles and other imperfections so it's a bit hypocritical to start holding the women we date to impossible standards. If I was back on the market I would be looking for someone who looks after themselves but that does not mean I am after some weird looking Love Island clone.

80sPadme · 24/07/2021 15:13

I found my 45 yr old partner ( I'm 38) at work when I least expected it. I would never have believed that he would be attracted to me but he apparently has been attracted to me sing the day we first met (A year before we dated). He loves my body and especially loves all the bits that I hate like my tummy and ass. Maybe I got lucky, maybe beauty is subjective, maybe I'm finally with a real man and not a 'lad'.
Whatever it is, I'm having the best sex I've ever had, feel attractive for the first time in my life and love that our relationship is solid regardless of how I look.

Danceswithwhippets · 24/07/2021 19:08

I had a partner who asked me this question, in similar forms, on a number of occasions, and was always infuriated by my (honest) answer.

Which was that if you fancy/love the person, then they're terrific. She seemed to interpret that as meaning I wasn't fussy, and would bonk whatever was available, which wasn't true. What I meant was that when you're committed and into someone emotionally, then you appreciate what you've got and the usual objective faults bodies have don't matter.

I used to tell her that she had a better figure than her (early 20's) daughter, which was true.

fussybloke · 24/07/2021 23:07

I'm fussy and very selective. Shallow maybe. By the time I have got to the stage where I have seen a woman's naked body (art school life classes excepted), I have been pretty certain that I'm not going to be turned off.

LipstickOnYourCollar5 · 25/07/2021 08:47

@fussybloke - Maybe not shallow but I suppose it depends what you mean by fussy, whether you just mean a slim woman, or whether there are lots of other specifics too.

blameless · 25/07/2021 22:59

Our flaws are like a baby's cry - when it's someone else's it's cute, when it's our own, it cuts us in half. For most of us, the things that make us attractive to others are rarely the qualities that we admire in others or ourselves.

66babe · 26/07/2021 19:01

@JustAnotherOldMan

The only 6 pack I have is in the fridge,

I think I still look okay for 51, as long as you squint, from a long ways a way…

That's my motto too ... I think if I found a guy with poor eye sight who was genuinely lovely ... I'd tell him I was a stunning ex supermodel 🤣

66babe · 26/07/2021 19:05

Sorry if this isn't the right place but I just thought of this and it still cracks me up today

Last time I tried OLD I swear never again
Had a message from Ron - 83 !
I was thinking oh bless him he wants a chat , some company it won't hurt me to say hi my dad is 76 so I accepted his request - first thing he says is " can I ask you a question?" I'm thinking oh dear he's going to ask if I'd consider dating a man his age .. so I reply " of course , ask away !" He then said ....

What size are your tits ?

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Echobelly · 26/07/2021 19:13

Not a man, but on another forum I polled (as I am saddened about women feeling so self-conscious about their bodies) whether any man there had ever walked out the door/stopped sexytime in its tracks when a woman took of her clothes and revealed 'imperfections'.

Not a single one had, and nearly 100 responded!

IME, men are too busy thinking 'YES! Naked woman!' to think 'Urgh, he stomach sticks out' or 'She's got cellulite' (newsflash, most men have no idea what it is and it's made up anyway www.refinery29.com/en-gb/what-is-cellulite-definition-fat-shaming-history ) or 'Oh, I thought her boobs would be bigger'.

I think when a guy pulls you, he knows what he's in for - if you're bigger, he knows that, if you don't have much in the way of boobs, he's clocked that and he doesn't care. I have a gratuitously imperfect body (inny nipples, large operation scars, large stomach) but I knew my body would turn on any guy when I took my clothes off because honestly they don't generally care about that, and if they are that shallow that they expected me to look like a model they could frankly fuck off.

mylovelydd · 26/07/2021 19:54

@Wherearemymarbles Speak for yourself! I'm almost 50 and look extremely good naked

mylovelydd · 26/07/2021 19:55

@66babe 😂😂😂😂

LipstickOnYourCollar5 · 26/07/2021 21:01

@66babe - Gotta love a trier 😂

66babe · 26/07/2021 21:15

@LipstickOnYourCollar5 @mylovelydd
I really didn't know if I should laugh or cry .. must admit .. this was my reply

I'm a stunning perfect size 10 with a pert pair of 32DD's .. would you like to see them ?

Then I blocked the cheeky fuck

Truth is I'm more of a fat size 12 and without my bra they've seen better days .. 🤣

SteelMack · 26/07/2021 22:45

@Danceswithwhippets

I had a partner who asked me this question, in similar forms, on a number of occasions, and was always infuriated by my (honest) answer.

Which was that if you fancy/love the person, then they're terrific. She seemed to interpret that as meaning I wasn't fussy, and would bonk whatever was available, which wasn't true. What I meant was that when you're committed and into someone emotionally, then you appreciate what you've got and the usual objective faults bodies have don't matter.

I used to tell her that she had a better figure than her (early 20's) daughter, which was true.

The comparison to her daughters figure is weird

AtticusHoysAnus · 28/07/2021 09:06

Nope.

Womens body's are incredible, cellulite, stretch marks, wobbly bits, the lot.

Abhannmor · 29/07/2021 17:02

My first gf had stretch marks , although we were both teenagers. I thought they looked cute , like tiger stripes. Had no idea what they were and assumed she was just born that way.

auberginesrus · 29/07/2021 17:18

@Echobelly

Not a man, but on another forum I polled (as I am saddened about women feeling so self-conscious about their bodies) whether any man there had ever walked out the door/stopped sexytime in its tracks when a woman took of her clothes and revealed 'imperfections'.

Not a single one had, and nearly 100 responded!

IME, men are too busy thinking 'YES! Naked woman!' to think 'Urgh, he stomach sticks out' or 'She's got cellulite' (newsflash, most men have no idea what it is and it's made up anyway www.refinery29.com/en-gb/what-is-cellulite-definition-fat-shaming-history ) or 'Oh, I thought her boobs would be bigger'.

I think when a guy pulls you, he knows what he's in for - if you're bigger, he knows that, if you don't have much in the way of boobs, he's clocked that and he doesn't care. I have a gratuitously imperfect body (inny nipples, large operation scars, large stomach) but I knew my body would turn on any guy when I took my clothes off because honestly they don't generally care about that, and if they are that shallow that they expected me to look like a model they could frankly fuck off.

Love this

In my very limited experience as a nearly 50 year old, newly single woman who is most definitely more than a stone overweight, this is most certainly true - and thank goodness.

Eesha · 30/07/2021 07:04

@Aliceclara I was inspired by a friend of mine who was possibly a size 18 but had such va va voom that I think most men we met were bowled over by her. She was very much fake it till you make it. Sexy heels, a glint in her eye. I realised confidence is everything and she was no doubt great fun in bed. So who wouldn't want that? If someone doesn't think you are amazing no matter what, then you move on. I'm a size 16 hourglass shape, very busty, and though I'm a working parent and very busy, when I go on dates etc, I use what I have to look hot! Sexiness comes from within.

Original poster

Aliceclara · 30/07/2021 16:44

@Eesha
Thanks. I am reasonably confident, certainly was when I was younger. I'm in my fifties now and in a new relationship. He's very appreciative and complimentary about my body which is lovely. But I can't help comparing it to when I was younger. I'm a size 10 with an hourglass figure but everything is a bit less smooth than it used to be! I guess I see the flaws and he sees the positives. I wondered really if men home in on our flaws, or just see the beauty, whatever our age or size.

OP posts:

Hrpuffnstuff1 · 30/07/2021 16:50

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brittleheadgirl · 30/07/2021 19:09

@Hrpuffnstuff1 bet you're fighting them off!!
I'm a size 8 but wouldn't go near somewhere with an attitude like yours!!

Hrpuffnstuff1 · 30/07/2021 19:14

I'm happy, 2 yrs in with house, wedding and baby enroute.
However she's not from the UK.

66babe · 30/07/2021 19:24

"Tbh The British are minging"

Well thank god none of us minging Brits have to worry about ending up with you then

brittleheadgirl · 30/07/2021 19:30

@66babe

"Tbh The British are minging"

Well thank god none of us minging Brits have to worry about ending up with you then

He's taken, don't worry! Poor woman

66babe · 30/07/2021 19:31

Oh i wasn't worried @brittleheadgirl I'm a fat size 12 so definitely wouldn't be getting a look in 🤣🤣🤣