Bisexuality

[Ingvermama]

I have recently come out to myself as bisexual. I have considered myself queer for a very long time but hasn't put a label on it.
I am married to a man and have teenage children, and I really love my home situation and this will not change, but am wondering how other bisexual women express their sexuality when in a heterosexual relationship?

And I don't mean by cheating, this is not an option!

Well you don't as that would be cheating really. Is irrelevant being bisexual. If in a relationship you don't look elsewhere

Sunflower, that's what I have said, I won't be cheating! I did wonder if there would be the usual disapproval from Mumsnet!
An example I have thought of is going to Pride, supporting LGBTQ business.

Does your dh know?

I suppose its irrelevant if you are in a happy relationship and married. It's like me, I'm married to a man, completely straight, I love cock but I don't feel the need to go around celebrating it?

The volturi, you celebrate 'cock' every time you make love or spend time with your partner!
I think maybe Mumsnet isn't the right forum for my question.
It's not really the sex part I'm asking about, it's the identity.

@Ingvermama

Sunflower, that's what I have said, I won't be cheating! I did wonder if there would be the usual disapproval from Mumsnet! An example I have thought of is going to Pride, supporting LGBTQ business.

That seems a really strange concept?

Would you go on a march for blonde people because you were attracted to them? Or try and buy form shops owned by brunettes?

Would you be OK with your husband doing things to support some group he was attracted to?

This isnt judgement but being bi in a monogamous relationship is no different to being straight in one.

Also you dont need to be bi to take part in pride etc.

There is a group knocking about here where bi women can chat about stuff but not sure if its pitched at those intending to act on it or not. Search fo it, i think its called looking for a like minded woman

I don't agree its irrelevant. Its highly relevant to who you are, even if never have a same sex relationship and remain committed to your husband.
Does he know? If so, you've got plenty of scope to express it between the two of you, just in terms of him acknowledging it and it not been a hidden part of you. If he doesn't know I think you'll find it hard to express it if the most significant person in your life doesn't know.

Thank you lilkem! It is so much more than just who I fancy. I haven't told him, but I am going to, just need to think how to drop that bombshell. One of our daughters is gay and I think my delight when she told me (quite a while ago) and supporting her has really made me realise I'm not being true to myself.

Marbles I have read that thread and I'm going to join the private chat that has evolved from it.
I think people who are gay or straight find bisexuality very threatening, and understandably as it appears we want our cake and eat it! I will not be acting on my feelings with anyone as I love my husband so much, he's my best friend. But
I look back on all the crushes I have had and probably 75% of them are on women, I remember aged 13 at high school my first proper crush was on an older girl who was tall with ginger hair, I just thought I wanted to be like her, but that theme has continued throughout my life!

@Ingvermama

Thank you lilkem! It is so much more than just who I fancy. I haven't told him, but I am going to, just need to think how to drop that bombshell. One of our daughters is gay and I think my delight when she told me (quite a while ago) and supporting her has really made me realise I'm not being true to myself.

Have sent you a pm

To be honest, lots of straight people also want their cake…..

I think the main concern is where the straight partner feels as if they are then unable to meet all the bi partners sexual needs.

I guess in some cases this is true and in some it isnt

Yeah, there is a group for bi or bi curious women to chat. It's anonymous too if you want it to be :)
Tried sending you the details but I don't think you have PMs set up

Jaydereilly, I have been getting messages from someone else on here, so not sure would you be happy to try again 🙂

If you pursue things which are not cheating but put you in the path of other like minded people will you not just frustrate yourself and become jealous that you cannot have what you really want?

I'm a bisexual female having had relationships with both sexes. I'm in a long term monogamous relationship with a pansexual man who's had relationships with both sexes and gender fluid /transgender individuals. We find others attractive but don't act on it. Like your suggestion there, we do celebrate Pride and openly so as we live in a very repressed non accepting area so if it shows somebody else a safe space, then it's worth doing.

Would mff threesomes with your H be an option?

I'm bisexual and a sex worker and couples bookings are my favourite.

I have friends with benefits so yes cheating but I'm ok with that 🤷‍♀️
I don't feel the need to go to pride and stuff like that because it's just part of who I am and doesn't need celebrating.

Being bisexual does not mean being in a relationship with one sex whilst yearning to be with the other sex.

You are married so it's irrelevant surely. If you want to watch porn with women then go do it but don't go seeking another relationship

I class myself as bisexual but nobody knows it.

I’m married with two children but get equally aroused by attractive women just as much as I can with attractive men.

I fantasise about women, not men.

I’m thinking about suggesting to my husband that we introduce another woman into our sex life under the guise of giving him a typical male fantasy, whereas in reality it would be because I want to be with a woman.

It’s a very confusing place to be in.