Confidence needed

[CherryBlossomPink]

I’ve been single for around 5 years since my divorce and my self confidence was in shreds when we split. I’m plus sized (around a size 22) and this had become a way for my ex to put me down by commenting on my size and how unattractive it was. I’ve spent the last few years building my confidence back and I’m getting there - I’ve lost some weight but doing it for the right reasons, and I can now look in the mirror and feel attractive in the right clothes.
I’ve signed up to online dating as I would like to start getting out more and I’m ready to be with someone again, and I’ve been on a few dates and found a guy I’m attracted to and would like to take it further.
He obviously can see I’m a big girl and in my rational moments I know that if he was put off by this, we wouldn’t still be going on dates, but I can’t help worrying about how I look naked, and don’t want this to be a problem when the time comes - how do I get past this!!
There’s still a voice in my head telling me men don’t find bigger women sexy!

I was married for 25 years to a woman who was a size 16. We split up and I did a lot of dating, size was never an issue for me, personality mattered, being able to hold a conversation mattered. I DTD with a few ladies of various sizes and enjoyed it no matter how big of small they were. Size is not important, you are important. I then met a lady who is size 8 or 10, fell in love and we have now been married for 17 years.

I still think about some of the bigger ladies I spent time with and how lovely they looked naked.

Really relax about this. I'm a 25 stone single man and I never cease to be amazed to find that there are women who find me attractive. Obviously I have to find the right ones but it's not as difficult as I would have thought.
I think it comes down to being comfortable in your own skin (literally) as well as relaxed and confident.
I use online dating too and as you realise it's important to make sure that your pictures and profile show the true you, no point in trying to be someone you are not.
People really fall into three catgegories:

1. Into big people 2) Not into big people 3) Don't mind / size is not the main issue. As I'm generally attracted to smaller women I think we must end up looking like some kind of little and large but that's not really anyone else's business. Go out and find someone who you fancy and who fancies you, maybe you already have.

Not really sure what you can do about confidence, but if you have been dating someone, then clearly size is not an issue for him, if you move into the bedroom try something like a babydoll if you don’t want to be completely naked.
As for being sexy, the most sexy woman is the one in the bedroom with you, who WANTS to have sex with you,

Most of us inhabit the real, unairbrushed world and know very well that women come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. I have dated some large women and the sex was very, very good indeed. I don't know whether these women were body confident, but they definitely gave me the impression they were. If they were anxious about how they looked when naked, that was never communicated to me and we just had tremendous fun together.

If you are nervous, then you have to fake that confidence. We men just love women who are happy to leave the light on as it were. You have been on a few dates with this chap and it is highly likely that he likes you as much as you like him. If your size was an issue, he would be chasing some size 8 woman.