Im in my late 20s, hes in his late 30s, we've been together for around a year and a half. Have sex mabey once every 3 months, the last time it didnt last long and i got pretty annoyed. We have talked about it and the last time i pressed on it because its making me very insecure, he said its because hes gained weight and feels sluggish.
In the first few months of our relationship we were having sex a decent amount, not a lot mabey once a week or once every 2 weeks, but because im a rape victim it triggered me a lot and it was almost impossible to relax, my brain has finaly made the connection that im safe so its not nearly as bad as it was then and now his sex drive has plummeted. Ive gone from always being raped by my ex to now no sex.
I just want to feel good about myself.
I know hes not realising the extent of the effect it has on me and i know he feels bad because ive bought it up three times and i could tell it hurt him but im literally at this point where im tempted to get it from someone else.
Being unfaithful is not me, but this feeling of never being wanted is intense, i feel like the last time i felt wanted was actually in my late teens so 19. After that i was in an abusive relationship where i was raped a bunch of times to now in a healthy relationship but sexless.
Anyone want to suggest something or share an experience.