Let me start by explaining the history. We are early to mid 30s. Been together 16 years. Always had a very very boring sex life even since we were young. He has a higher sex drive than me but still not high. Have spent most of our lives only doing anything from foreplay upwards maybe once a week or fortnight. After dc it dropped to once every 3 or 4 months which was bad and started to cause us big issues. Things have got marginally better, as in monthly at worst which is still terrible.
I've tried everything over the years, no contraception due to hormones, different forms of contraception, hypnotherapy, counselling. I just am not that interested.
Aside from the shit sex life we have a very very happy marriage.
Fast forward to 2 weeks ago. I was in bed about to fall asleep and had my back to dh. He grabbed my hair into a ponytail and yanked my head backwards. I had no idea wtf was happening. Then he started kissing my neck. It felt nice and I started to get turned on and he could tell, so he started pulling my hair more but practically dragging my around the bed by it, then forcefully flipping me over, pinning me down, not asking me if I was enjoying what he was doing as he usually does.
He was forceful throughout, it is so out of character I was really taken aback and didn't say no or stop him. In a weird way I enjoyed the fact that I felt like I wasn't given the option or in control. We both came and i woke the next day feeling confused.
The same thing has happened about 4 times since. He starts by pinning me down and waits for me to get wet before we have sex. The foreplay is minimal now.
I guess I am asking whats happening here?
Is this him saying he is fed up of waiting for me to make the first move?
Is this him trying something new to see if it turns me on?
Is this him into something himself that I wasn't aware of and that I need to be wary of?
I am sure someone here can shed some light for me. 