Sex with a new man who is shielding

[AndyandTeddy]

After a long marriage of most unsatisfactory sex, premature ejaculation and no passion. I am separated and have met a new man. We've been acquainted for a year (sports club) but met by chance a couple of months ago. We met again by chance and are now regularly play that sport together. He asked for my help with something, we spent the day together and he took me out to dinner to say thanks.
Now the sex bit. He rocks my boat, he is sexy, good looking, funny. I can't wait to get my hands on him. But he has a long-term illness and is shielding. He says he can't even hug his grand-children. Is there any hope? I don't even know if he's interested in me sexually. Except we are spending all this time together. If it wasn't for the shielding I would have have made the first move, but feel I can't.

He doesn't sound like he's shielding to me??

I'm confused, as he's definitely not shielding if he's out and about socially and playing sport etc!

Sport is only outside, we've only met up outside. It's the close contact he seems to be avoiding. This is the first person I've met other than OLD and people I've known for years know him, so I'm hoping he's genuine.

Can you be in a 'bubble' together?
Cam you reassure him you're not having close contact with anyone else, and minimise your risk as much as possible?

I don't want to upset you, but if he is afraid to cuddle his grandchildren then there is unlikely to be a way that you can persuade him to get between the sheets for some fun.

I might be wrong, as an erection rarely has a conscience, but that is the way it looks to me.

Are you in a relationship together, or just acquaintances?
It seems that he enjoys your company but I’m not seeing signs he wants more, or have you missed some bits out?

Surely you are both old enough to just talk about it openly? Tell him how you feel and see how he responds. He'll either tell you he isn't interested in you romantically, that he is but needs to put intimacy on hold until the health risks are reduced or he'll throw caution to the wind and whisk you off to the bedroom. Whichever ends up being the case at least you'll know where you stand and the world won't end if it turns out he isn't after a relationship.

He says he can't even hug his grand-children

I think he’s letting you know he won’t be getting close to you. Sorry.

Thank you for your responses. I think I'm just flattered by the attention from an attractive man. My Ex was a miserable bore who ignored me and my wants and needs, so to have a man who wants to spend time with me is a turn-on. I keep thinking would I spend this time with him if he was female or gay or just not attractive but still with the same funny entertaining personality? Would he spend the day with me and end up buying me dinner if he wasn't interested? He said the problem with the grand-children is that they are looked after by the other grand-parents who haven't a clue about social distancing and Covid hygiene. Any way he wants to meet me again so I can give him some more help for this little project he's doing. I'm just going to take it as it comes, but when you're getting on a bit it doesn't come along often! I need to delve deeper! Wish me luck!

If he's playing sport and taking you out to dinner he's NOT shielding though.

Sounds a player to me sorry

It's possible he just enjoys your company and/or wants your help with the project.

Well our friendship is continuing. Perhaps he is using me for company. It's still lovely to spend the afternoon with an attractive, funny man; looking into those hazel brown eyes, the swept back salt and pepper hair and those muscular limbs! We are meeting to play sport next week and both want to meet up for another outing too. I missed, perhaps deliberately an opportunity to ask about his ex yesterday. He was talking in positive terms about the mother of his adult daughter. I know he lives on his own, perhaps she left him or died? Something stopped me enquiring, I think because I don't want to spoil what I have by talking about relationships and for him to say he's not interested.......