Post birth vagina

[Zozzy9]

OK information overload coming....
I had my child 6 years ago. It was a pretty awful birth, so bad that I decided not to try for a second child. The thing is, my vagina entrance is still huge even after all this time. If I try to look at it in a mirror and I swear that I can see my insides. It's horrific and makes me feel so incredibly un feminine. My sex life is non existent. Has anyone else been in this situation? If so, is there any advice, exercises or hope that you can offer me? Thanks x

Hi,
A little input from a woman who has had three babies, two vaginally and one c-section. I haven’t noticed any difference to my vagina since having my three babies, I did have some internal grazing after my first vaginal delivery but this hasn’t made a difference to how things look and feel. Is it possible that you have a prolapse? How does sex feel? (I know you’ve said your sex life is non-existent but the times you have had sex post-birth). I think it’s worth discussing this with your GP, I can imagine it’s quite common and they can offer helpful advice, regarding exercises etc.

Mine is mangled. No advice, just solidarity. I think most of them look different after childbirth. I have a mild vaginal prolapse. Also had a very hard birth.

Do you mean VULVA? How it looks outside ? I’m confused

I imagine that the OP doesn't mean Vulva. Or at least not the whole Vulva and instead means specifically the vaginal opening.

Have you discussed this with your gynaecologist or at your smear test? How is your pelvic floor?

I’m the same. Some people just ruin their vaginas giving birth, no one talks about it. Childbirth Can causes sexual dysfunction.

I don’t think there is much you can do about it if kegels don’t work then there is surgery but I’ve been told that can cause more problems.

I wonder if this is why it used to be common in the 1930s for the midwife to ask some new mums when doing stitches "would you like another stitch for your husband?"

I'm really sorry you had such a difficult birth.

Is it the appearance of the opening of your vagina that's your main concern, or do you feel there's an problem with the condition of your vagina itself?

I improved my muscle tone post-birth using a kegel8 machine. It's a bit spendy, but was great for me as I was too lazy to do the exercises myself and wanted a good result quickly. I couldn't keep a tampon in for the first few years after DD was born, plus I had a bladder prolapse that was bulging into my vagina, but now everything's really toned and in good shape.

Anyway, it's good you're seeking help. It sounds like the injuries you sustained continue to have a huge impact on your life. Unfortunately too many women get dismissed with well-meaning but misguided comments like 'all vaginas look different, and that's okay' or 'just be thankful you've got a healthy baby'. It really annoys me, as the quality of life implications of gynae issues can be huge, especially as we age.

All vaginas, vulvas to be pedantic, are different pre and post birth and post hysterectomy.

Did you honestly just mansplain female genitals to a woman? JFC.

She means her vagina. Not her vulva.

And namechange the “husband stitch” is still done by some obstetricians now - sadly it is not a relic of the past.

In fairness (1) OP talks about the appearance of the “entrance”

To her vagina. She knows what her vagina is.
To be pedantic, what would the “entrance” to her vulva be?

and in fairness (2) there’s a lot of womansplaining on MumsNet about mens’ bits and pieces, issues and habits (including opinions about deathgrip)

Do MN users frequently tell you that you’re using inaccurate terms to describe your own genitals? I highly doubt that. Talking about your own personal experience with a man’s genitals is very different from correcting a man talking about his own. If you posted about a cyst on your testicle and a woman said “I think you’ll find you mean your scrotum” you’d be pretty bemused, I’m sure.

Go and see a gp or womens health physio if you are worried. There is a huge range of 'normal' so posting a pic, even that graphic, isn't enough

Core core core and Pilates
and more core

its taken years !!
now she’s not what she was but my partner can cum inside me and I was sooo worried he wouldn’t be able to

never stop it now