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No bosom!

2 replies

Ooerr · 24/06/2020 07:34

Hi, oh this is hard to write!
Had a masectomy/ kids etc so don’t feel so attractive. Also have a prolapse of sorts, so have gone off putting a willy up there 😃
Hubby not generally affectionate but doesn’t get that I’d like hugs etc through the day - Anyway last night he suggested I come to his room, asked me to help him put the sheet on, duvet all crumpled, no pillow..He sort of moves in, but am so not interested. I think it’s cos he looks like he’s in his own fantasy land and not actually bothered about me. He did say he loves me, and I said, ‘you just want to get sex!’ And he said, after a pause, ‘ is that so wrong’ In a jokey way. Anyway I usually just retreat into my own fantasy but really couldn’t be arsed.
After sex he usually talks immediately about the kids which I find wierd.
Then I go back to my room because he listens to radio all night.
Writing this out it doesn’t sound much fun tbh. Reading another post on good in bed where the poster said hubby tells her how gorgeous she is and takes an interest in her body. Am keen to up the ante, or learn what to do, but I dunno. Think it might be different if he at least came into my room and chatted and cuddled and showed an interest. Going to help him tuck the sheet in while he got out the shower wasn’t the most sexy thing ever. Guess am just generally asking for any thoughts, advice.

OP posts:
thisstooshallpass · 24/06/2020 20:56

Hello
Why don't you go back in for a cuddle, he is obviously trying to intice you. Perhaps he's as anxious as you are?
You both sound like you want to have some intimacy.
If it's something you'd like to pursue then you have to talk/show him you're interested.
Xx

GalaxyGirl24 · 25/06/2020 19:45

It sounds like you definitely need to sit and have a chat with him about how you're feeling, never know, he might be feeling anxious too. He might be worried about how to approach you, or not wanting to be too over the top? Sounds like you need him to help with making sure you feel loved and attractive to him! I think maybe men can sometimes assume that you're aware of how they feel and that they find you attractive. Also, if he's not naturally romantic/aware of the need for a build up/you've been together a long time and are very comfy with each other, he might not realise that asking you to help change the sheets and then trying to start sex may not be the best approach!
Can you do anything to help yourself feel sexier/more attractive as well? Just for your own sake? Xo

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