Anyone else lay back and think of England?

[carrottopper]

For around a year, I've just not been interested. I'm 40 with two young children and just can't be bothered anymore. Hubby is getting frustrated that I don't seem to want it anymore. Anyone else?

Not here! I’m similar age to you and, if anything, my libido has increased with age. I’ve had different “bed friends” along the way though.

Oh god yes. Can’t think of anything worse, it’s a chore up there with cleaning the oven!

I’m 60 and DH and I have never been more sexually active. Is he looking out for you with mind blowing foreplay?

Yes I used to. I'm now divorced - says it all really.

When you think of England in this expression I always thought it means thinking of a greater good that you are achieving by having sex with this person. Is your greater good saving your marriage? Do you actually want to save it?

Nope nor would I. Talk to your husband about what you would enjoy. The times I’ve really not felt like sex have been when I haven’t felt looked after in other ways. Is he doing his fair share of housework/child care?

I used to with my ex and that's why he's my ex! I'm in my early 40s now and have been with my dh for 16 years and we can't get enough of each other, it never fails to cheer us up and relax after a hard day with the kids. How old are yours? if they are toddlers you may find as they get older/start school that your sex drive comes back. Small children are exhausting.

How demeaning this must be for all involved..

Nope! Been with DH 27 years, sex is better than ever atm.

Absolutely not. He's the one who can't keep up with me at the min! Possibly coming off the pill has something to do with my sex drive being through the roof... it's always been high but this is ridiculous!

How old are your children OP? That sounds really tough, but not uncommon with young children. Can you talk to your DH and work out what's going on? It must be either a physical or psychological reason. Are you exhausted, touched out or feeling taken for granted? If I was you I'd go to the GP to rule out any medical reason too. You're still fairly young for perimenopause, but perhaps hormones could be a factor. Sometimes women's sex drives go through the roof, other times the opposite. If you're exhausted it could be Vit D Levels, iron levels, B12 etc. A blood test could show all of this.

They are both under 7. Homeschooling, working and feeling over weight isn't helping plus hubby works 12-13 hours days at the moment so I'm solo parenting for 5-6 days a week at the moment. Thanks for your replies

Yep, same boat as you OP.

Twin 3.5 year olds, large house that's always an utter state and finding hard to keep on top of, work full time and cannot be chewed to have sex.

When we DTD I mostly try and just fantasise about anything that will make me orgasm as quickly as possible (which isn't that quickly to be fair) so I can go to sleep.

It's a source of arguments in the house as my husband would have sex every day ideally, whereas I would happily go without. He's attentive during, happy to go down on me for hours, it's just not in my headspace! :(