Husband can only have sex WITH condom

[threesecrets]

As the title says, DH can only have sex when using a condom. If he tries to enter without he looses his erection and says it hurts. It's then sore and we can try again. But clearly this puts a downer on things. Last night we stopped. He had managed to start sex but couldn't finish. Any advice? Or anyone had the same as this.

Is his penis normal or has he got a condition such as phimosis? Can't imagine if everything is normal why it hurts and he loses erection.

Looks normal but then I haven't seen that many penises and I'm not a doctor!!

Is his forskin tight does it pull all the way back and tuck behind glands easy when erect .Tmi sorry but when you bang away bareback forskin pulled right back over glands .If its tight every thrust will making it stretch tight which hurts . Condoms restrict how much forskin moves .

Not sure, I'm not a man but will ask him. Suppose I need a man who had this problem to offer advice

Yes you need more information...but probably a visit to the GP!

Has it always been like this?

If phimosis it is easily sorted. They may suggest stretching etc but the best solution is a circumcision. He won't look back after that and I suspect you will like it as well

@Namechangedyorkshire how would we arrange an adult circumcision? Would that be private?

I believe that adult circumcision is done on the NHS is for medical reasons. I knew someone who had it performed as a 50-something, for medical reasons and that was NHS

I had something like this problem until my late 20s. Sex was actually more pleasant for me with a condom. Otherwise, it was just too intense, and not in a pleasant way. I had to try and make sure my foreskin didn't' slip back over my glans and expose it, which meant I had to pull out and readjust. My orgasms often weren't particulary nice, just intense. I don't remember there being a problem keeping my erection, but had it been ever so slightly worse, I might have been put off enough for that to happen.

Nothing to do with phimosis, and, as you can imagine, even the thought of circumcision make me wince, even though I'm older now and have a less sensitive cock! It would have been the very worst thing I could have done.

Sorry if TMI but this is in the hope that it sheds some light on your DH's problem & there isn't that much info out there.

Ok so this thread is now a bit of a non starter as we had sex and it was fine. Apparently, according to him, the issue is a short frenulum... but with careful entry and lots of lube things were fine. Obviously it was a little less stimulating as there was a lot of lube so took longer to cum but was all good in the end!

@threesecrets

Your post was a little confusing as it sounded like you hadn't had sex before but he is your DH?

Anyway, glad the issue is resolved although not sure how a short frenulum would have caused the problem. If he had been looking at NHS do for medical reasons but I would have suggested he went private for a number of reasons.

short frenulum can be sorted doesn't need full circumcision .

@Namechangedyorkshire, a short frenulum would restrict movement of the foreskin which could be uncomfortable during unprotected sex where there’s skin to skin and therefore more friction. Loads of lube will reduce that.

@Namechangedyorkshire sorry it was confusing. We usually use a condom but we're trying to conceive so stopped and that's when the problems started

Glad to hear you found a solution. Just to let you know regarding conceiving, lube can slow down his sperms ability to swim, it's not a spermicide but can affect their "potency". Maybe try a high quality silicone based lube that you will require less of and won't dry up like most water based lube. The Durex Glide is very good.
Best of luck with the baby making.

@Namechangedyorkshire a short frenulum can defiantly be painful as when thrusting/penetrating the vagina grips and pulls down on the shaft skin - this force is all transferred through the frenulum to one point on the head rather than all through the while circumference of the foreskin/penis join. in bad cases it can even start bending the head down before the skin is even pulled back behind the head. In the worst cases it can even snap/rip during sex - and that's a bloodbath.
There are easy fixes though - that can even be done at home/yourself if your not too squeamish (&hygienic about it). Look up frenulum threading or frenulum tying. Basically put a stitch through the tight part of the frenulum and tying it tight so that in a few days it cuts through the bit of skin. This extends the frenulum by at least twice the depth of the stitch.
That's how mine got sorted. Needed doing twice, and now have about an inch extra length in frenulum an no more pain when it pulled back - the whole skin can now pull back flat against the shaft all the way round. Oh and there was not a single drop of blood involved