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Bored, but certainly not past it!

1 reply

chocolatekimmy · 09/02/2020 22:19

I'm in my 40's, married to my childhood sweetheart and we have children. I love my husband to bits and can't imagine life without him.

But, I'm bored. I want to be lusted after now and again and surprised on occasion. I'm fed up of the arse grabs with a childish comment or the lack of foreplay, or not being made to feel sexy. We've had more than one conversation over the past couple of years and it improves for a while then reverts back again. I'm fed up of being the one coming up with new ideas to spice things up. To me he is passive (in other ways too) and I don't know how this can be fixed.

Perhaps I'm asking for too much as nobody's perfect right? He is a good man, great dad, loyal, does lots around the home.

This can't be how it is for the rest of our lives though. Whilst quality over quantity is more important (he's never been particularly demanding but equally would never say no) when we do it I want it to be good and not left feeling disappointed. I do oblige at times when I'm not up for it as I don't want to deny him as I believe its a very important part of a relationship but then it just feels mechanical and faked.

I've just made an initial enquiry to a sex therapist so if anyone can relate to this and found it useful I'd be interested to hear about your experience.

OP posts:
Justaordinarybloke · 11/02/2020 18:54

Initiate like you would normally do but try wearing something a bit seductive when you do with come to bed eyes. Once there don't let him fuck you just keep pushing his head down between your legs, only let him have is way once your satisfied. Do those every time and he will soon get the message no PIV until he's pleased you in other ways.

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