Swingers clubs

[ToSwingOrNot]

Name change ...

I’m considering visiting a sex club/ swingers club with my FB and have a few questions which I hoping to get some honest answers to ..
I’m 48 years young and my buddy is a little younger. We met on Fab and we’ve been together for a few months. I like him, and he likes me but I’m not overly body confident nor confident with my looks and am worried that I’ll become very self conscious and jealous.
So, what can I expect when I walk through the doors ?!
What should I wear and what should I change into ?
Is it best to go out of town rather than stay in my local city ?
Is is best to go later in the evening rather than when the doors open?
What happens if my FB’s jaw hits the floor and goes off with someone else ?
Has anyone found that it puts an end to their relationship ?

Hi.
I swing, started going to clubs on the summer and I absolutely love it!! It is just about the most liberating (and addictive) thing I have ever done.

The first time I went o was literally sweating in the carpark as I was so terrified but within 10 minutes of being there I knew it was right.

People are open, kind, non pushy, respectful, fun. There's something for everyone there. My advice, if you're even remotely thinking about going just do it - we only get one life...!!!

@Rebecca75 weird question but do you mind me asking what kind of figure you have? I’ve l always been intrigued by swinging/exhibitionism and voyeurism but I have health problems which have made me put on a lot of weight and I’m really out of condition.
I know I could wear a flattering basquey type thing and hopefully keep it on but I’m so scared of people laughing or being repulsed by me!
Also, what sort of age group is there?

Hi outherealone
I'm quite tall, average figure. There are all sorts there - all ages from mid--twenties through to granny types, all figures ranging from athletic to morbidly obese.

Some people choose to wear little and some cover up with dresses, underwear etc.

I've never seen or heard about anyone being laughed at or talked about.

I'm happy for you to pm me.

Xx

Awww thank you @Rebecca75
I might pm you if I get closer to actually going. I am intrigued tho, think it could be a lot of fun.

Waves at @Marlboroandmalbec34

Op, (and anyone else watching / lurking)
As a pp has said, we only get one life. Personally, I'd rather die regretting something I did do, rather than something I didn't..

If you do decide to go, no-one will make you do anything you aren't comfortable with / don't want to do.

No means no in these places, and if someone doesn't get the message, don't hesitate to report them to the staff / management.

If you can't stand the thought of going alone, go with a friend / partner / fb / fwb ,me, but make sure you have discussed things beforehand. Ensure you are both on the same page, have agreed what's in, and what's out, and stick to it.

Absolutely do not worry about your looks / figure / age / whatever. As a pp has said, there are all shapes, sizes and ages going to the clubs.

One or more females will definitely get attention (even in a mixed sex couple) - the same is not true for single guys

Treat it as an adventure. You will meet all sorts of people, some of whom could become life-long friends.

By all means, feel free to pm me for a male perspective.

Hi everyone, sorry to revive a bit of an old thread. This is something I have been thinking about going to for a while, and actually joined kk and booked to go (on my own!) to a party in March, which was of course, cancelled. I am 45 and not exactly glamorous, so not sure I will fit in at kk, though.
@ToSwingOrNotToSwing, @outtherealone - did you end up going? I am ethically non-monogamous, but don’t think ready to go with my partner, so was thinking of finding a friend to go with. I live in London. Post Coronavirus world, of course. I do wonder how long away that will be.

@WitchSerafina
All clubs are (obviously) currently closed, and no-one knows when (or even if!) they will open.

IMHO, KK is for the "beautiful people", not mere mortals like me..

As a PP said, and I concur, there are all sorts of looks, ages, shapes and sizes that go. You'll be fine.

If you are on one of the swinger websites, it'll be easy to find someone to go with.. Convincing a friend might be more difficult..

I'm seriously hoping things get back to something approaching normality soon, but am not holding my breath...

Whatever you decide, have fun!

Thanks for the reply, @AverageGuy.
Yes, it’s a delicate conversation to have with existing friends. I may need to find new friends to go with. I do hope things get back to normal soon.

@WitchSerafina - if you were interested in a male friend to go with.....

Who knows, one of your female friends might really be interested in it. Not quite sure how you would broach the subject though.. Good luck!

@WitchSerafina
I did go to a club yes, but not with the FB - he is no longer on the scene.
It was an old club in Sheffield, and wasn't the best of experiences.
It was the 2nd week in January so was freezing - don't think I took my coat off never mind anything else !
There also wasn't many people there so there wasn't a buzz about the place.

It was a very spontaneous visit with a gf who had been before so it was a giggle if nothing else.

@WitchSerafina I'm a member of Killing Kittens having joined in September at the ripe old age of 45!

I totally disagree with the comments about KK being for the young and beautiful. I've met Kittens, Toms and couples in their 40s and 50s. All different shapes and sizes. Wrinkles. Scars. Stoma bags. The whole range.

The appeal of KK for me is that it is a community of non-judgmental people who all support each other. It's not just about hook ups or swinging or kink.

The number one benefit is that guys cannot send messages to women without having first sought permission in the group chat. At events guys cannot approach women, they have to wait to be introduced. So I feel safer on KK than on other dating apps or in a normal club.

Yes, there is a Silver chat group if you want to join it but I'm hanging out in Kittens Chat, Singles and Filthy Flirts!

Drop me a DM if you want any more insight