Why aren't I wanting sex?

[emilyjayne5]

So my and my partner have been together got 5 years and have 2 kids together so I've completely lost my sex drive! When we first got together we were like rabbits and then we had kids so understandably we slowed down but still had a decent sex life. But over this last year I've just not been wanting it at all.
I don't know if it's me, I have lost so much confidence, I've gained weight, I don't like him to touch me when were in bed, I just don't feel attractive so in my head I think my partner doesn't think I am, even though he tells me I'm beautiful i just don't believe him.
My partner has always had very high sex drive and I know he's started to watch porn whilst I'm at work in the evening. Part of me is annoyed and then part of me is relieved so then he doesn't come to me for it.
Am I weird for thinking/ being like this?
Any word of wisdom would be helpful.

Have you considered seeing your GP?

I think you could be on a slippery slope if you don’t tackle this.

Good luck

I've thought about going to the GP but I would even know where to being with them. What would they even be able to do?

Go to your GP and be honest that you've lost your libido and it is affecting your relationship.

@emilyjayne5 I was like this. I went to see my go and he confirmed I had depression and prescribed anti depressants almost instantly my libido came back and were at it like rabbits now and have sex 7 times since Monday bit of a difference from once every 2-3 months. Seriously go see your gp and explain and be honest.

I felt very much like you - no libido ajd and generally flat. Came off the mini-pill and wow - sex drive back and it's amazing. So maybe look into your contraception. We're currently using condoms and DH has been to doctors to enquire about a vasectomy. I have never felt better - didn't realise how bad I was feeling til I felt better if that makes sense.

I really want to come off contraception because I really do feel like that's affecting me, I've twice changed my contraception this year and nothing. I've spoke to my GP about sterilization but she said they don't do it anymore. I have book another appointment at the GP to talk about my low libido so hopefully they will help me. I've tried talking to my other half but its really difficult because he really doesn't understand wants going

I feel exactly the same. I honestly could’ve written this. I’m 42, have 2 small children and I desperately want to want have sex but I’ve got absolutely no sex drive and I don’t know what to do about it. It’s really really worrying me

I used to have a really high sex drive and I’ve been the partner who has been rejected and it’s a horrible horrible feeling. The thought that my husband could be feeling like this breaks my heart

Never really thought of going to GP about it

Ok so I went to the GP and they've given me antidepressants. I feel slightly disappointed, I wanted advised and some help but I don't know if antidepressants will help me. Anyone had similar experience?

I went to the GP about my low mood and ragey moodswings and asked if it could be the pill. He said no and prescribed me sertraline (anti anxiety). I was too scared to take it, so have been going for private counselling instead and have been off the mini-pill for three weeks and am feeling so much better. Didn't realise I'd lost my sex drive til it came back. Good luck with getting sorted, it's so hard to know what to do for the best isn't it.

There is a long thread in the Family Planning section about MNers’ experience of hormonal contraception. A VERY large number of posters reported loss of libido. It’s an old thread but worth a read: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/family_planning/2332608-Do-you-use-or-have-you-ever-used-hormonal-contraception-like-the-Pill-IUD-or-implant-Fancy-telling-us-what-you-think-about-it
I am in this boat at the moment and about to get my implant removed to see if it helps. I 100% agree with previous poster that you should look at your contraception first and try taking a break from it so that your body can normalise. It’s easy to blame life and kids getting in the way but there may be quite a simple medical reason why this is happening.