Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Sex

You need to have been registered for 7 days to post in the Sex forum. Please don’t send unwanted PMs to other users.

Original poster

How can I be memorable?

20 replies

Petra42 · 20/08/2019 07:26

In a good way of course! My partner has had a lot of partners and a lot of sex. I haven't! He knows he is the best I've had but I want to be memorable too! I love being with him in bed, we have a good friendship outside as well. I love pleasuring him and vice versa, we enjoy PIV sex, anal sex, dress up, some bondage etc but my insecurity makes me wonder about him having better sex with others and that plays on my mind a lot. How can I get over this?

OP posts:
GrannyHaddock · 20/08/2019 07:48

It's not a competition!

GrannyHaddock · 20/08/2019 07:51

The joy and enthusiasm in your post is memorable in itself.

NameChangeNugget · 20/08/2019 08:54

Cum gargling after a BJ was a winner, when DH and I first started datIng. Was definitely a turning point.

xpc316e · 20/08/2019 11:58

Enthusiasm brought about by the confidence that he has chosen to be with you might just do the trick. Forget his past (and yours); just live for the here and now when in bed.

Best wishes.

Original poster
Petra42 · 20/08/2019 12:29

@xpc316e I definitely have the enthusiasm as it's a whole new world for me. But confidence is something I lack a bit because some exes were wilder (could gush and also did threesomes etc). How can I compete with that? He says it's always great with us but I can't figure out why he would say this when exes were so much wilder!

OP posts:
noego · 20/08/2019 14:14

If he's talking about exes being better and wilder in bed than you I'de be getting shut of him. This is looking like mind games and you're already questioning yourself. Slippery slope.........

Original poster
Petra42 · 20/08/2019 14:43

@noego not really, we have been friends for ages so I knew about his flings anyway. He always reassures me saying it's all great but obviously i don't want to draw too much attention to not feeling experienced enough.

OP posts:
xpc316e · 20/08/2019 15:24

Wilder does not necessarily mean better. Perhaps with you he feels some sort of emotional connection with you that lifts things onto a different level? Perfect bodies, uninhibited behaviour, threesomes, etc., are not everything and maybe he now wants what you can offer. He may even be making love to you while he was just having sex with the others. Do not underestimate yourself.

Original poster
Petra42 · 20/08/2019 15:48

@xpc316e I'm pretty sure it's not love but definitely the emotional connection makes it feel great. I guess what I'm looking for is what can blow his mind a bit

OP posts:
xpc316e · 20/08/2019 17:24

Petra42, there does not seem to be much wrong with what you are doing at present, as far as he is concerned. You don't sound as though you got out of a convent last weekend, so you will no doubt be well aware of most things that humans can get up to in the name of sex. Just communicate with him; tell him how you feel. Most men are going to feel really honoured when a woman tells a chap that she wants to rock his world. Why not simply ask him whether there is anything he would like you to try? What is the worst thing that could happen?

Good luck.

FuriousVexation · 21/08/2019 11:05

"Wilder" can in some cases actually be off-putting. I'm thinking of the younger men I've banged who were certainly "wilder" in terms of what they requested (anal, watersports, ridiculously uncomfortable positions) but were actually horribly tiresome. It was all about "the performance" - like they thought they were having to live up to some ridiculous expectations, rather than what I actually wanted, which was a good session with plenty of decent oral both ways, possibly some toy use, dirty talk, and a shag in COMFORTABLE position(s) e.g. me on top, missionary, from behind. Then finish with oral most likely. Maybe in 69 position.

Much better than with someone who thinks they're auditioning for a role in a sub-standard porn film.

Are there things you'd like to explore but haven't yet? Trying new things (even if he's done them before with someone else) can be a massive turn on.

Original poster
Petra42 · 21/08/2019 14:51

@FuriousVexation I completely agree with you and enjoy everything you like. This is what we do together. All the porn stuff is stuff my partner has also done. I think his biggest fantasy is me with other men and women. He would never push me into this but I know it's something he did with some others. It's something I've thought about but never had the courage to do.

OP posts:
1forAll74 · 22/08/2019 03:58

It seems that your partner is happy to be with you as you are. It's pointless to be thinking what he has done with women in the past. I would not like to know these personal details anyway. It has now made you think about biggie wow factor things regarding your sex life with him.. But anyway,all these big things may happen sooner or later,if you stop thinking about them..

Shortstuff99 · 22/08/2019 07:59

I’d consider wearing his team’s footie strip, or getting really high together before sex, or both, these can make things stand out IME

AllOrNothin · 03/09/2019 19:37

I'm in a similar situation in reverse and totally, completely happy with how things are. I'm not expecting any out of this world sexual adventures because that's not why we are together / not what attracts me to him. I do like sex with him of course but it's not because I spend time comparing it to all my other sexual experiences!!! What would impress me is complete confidence in the fact that I find him hot as fuck, and realisation that comparisons with my previous lovers are essentially unsexy insecurities that get in the way of us having fun here and now. It would also impress me if I knew that he understands the flip side of my experience: getting bored quickly, desire for sexual variety etc. and that he is truly happy to accept me for who I am.

AllOrNothin · 03/09/2019 19:39

Back to answering your question, you could offer a trip to Fun4Two or Fata Morgana club in Amsterdam. Things don't get much more memorable than that ;-)

busybarbara · 03/09/2019 19:57

Cum gargling after a BJ was a winner, when DH and I first started datIng

I'm guessing you soon knocked that on the head after getting married. I would Grin

SimonJT · 04/09/2019 01:46

He won’t care that you’re less experienced, my ex has had countless partners, he wasn’t bothered in the slighest that I hadn’t had sex with anyone, current partner also, pretty much countless and not at all bothered that he is my second.

You need to work on your confidence and how you view yourself.

Dinks66 · 04/09/2019 21:51

You can be memorable by being lovely, kind etc out of the bedroom. He didn't stay with any of those other women. Personalities, not giving the best BJ's, make men stay in the long term.

leila382 · 11/09/2019 22:54

Looks like you have a great relationship and you're already doing a lot to make your sexual relationship even better, and that's amazing! We can tell stop comparing yourself with his previous partners but we all have a similar kind of a thought in the back of our heads sometimes too... To make yourself memorable, do something not that many women do - there are over 100 hand job techniques, over 30 blowjob techniques you could use, there's sensual massage, lap dance... You can practice squeezing and give him (and yourself) unique sensations when he's inside... One more great thing to do is to initiate communication, be open to discuss and explore fantasies, which sounds like you may already do and which not that many people actually do!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page

This topic prevents users from posting on it until they have been members for at least 7 days.