Tightness

[Answers4hubby]

My OH believes she isn’t as tight as she once was (pre babies) but I honestly haven’t noticed a difference. There’s a difference for me when using condoms but otherwise it’s still good! Is tightness really ever an issue or is it a psychological thing?

If it feels exactly the same for you then maybe it is psychological, however it could be that it does actually feel different for her. I've never given birth, but one of my friends did say that sex changed for her afterwards. She did feel 'looser'. That said her DH never complained. I think for the time being your job is to reassure her and maybe change techniques or try other stuff which stimulates her clitoris directly if she isn't getting the same stimulation from PIV . In short it could be psychological (often it probably is) but it could also not be and the physical changes need accounting for in your lovemaking and reassurance that it's all still fabulous.

My dh told me I was looser after birth and he couldn't feel much, and it basically fucked our sex life for years as I couldn't get over hearing that for a long time. The shame for me was that sex was actualky better for me afterwards. Tread very carefully. Tell her how good it feels. Consider trying a female condom?

after 3 kids and 15 years, the fanjo is definitely not what it was! nothing wrong with acknowledging that, as that might make her feel better, but only if you can genuinely tell her it's still great. sex evolves through the course of a relationship. a bit more room down there can make positions that were once uncomfortable, more enjoyable, and you can go a bit... harder!