Inexperienced question

[sammylady37]

Hi

I (despite my age) don’t have a huge amount of sexual experience and am not terribly confident in bed.

I recently signed up to a website for casual encounters for a few reasons- one cos I’ve been single a while and two because I wanted to simply gain more experience and confidence.

Had first encounter on Sunday with a local guy. He was nervous. Anyway, we were having sex and next thing he said “I think I came’. There hadn’t been any change in his breathing/moaning or pace immediately before this, which is what I’d have expected. Then he pulled out and looked at the condom to see if there was semen in it, and after seeing there was he said “yeah, I came”. Is it really possible for him to have cum without realizing it?? Surely he’d have had the physical and mental accompanying sensations??

I never experienced anything like this with s man before and I’m a bit puzzled.

because of the very casual nature of all this I don’t want to get into a conversation with him about it.

Any insights appreciated!

He knew he came, but was embarrassed to admit how quickly and easily he did. He's probably quite lacking in confidence himself.

Shit, I've had a few PEs, and yeh they're not confidence building. I normally go down at this point (which I love), and by the time she's tapping out, I'm ready to go straight away again. 2nd round is usually a very vigorous sweaty dominant affair as the 1st round nerves have disipitated.

Thanks Pete, I guess that makes sense.

It’s amazing how nervous men can be at times. The second time with someone new is often better than the first.

Each woman to her own. It’s nice that you are keen on adjusting your inexperience, which is a good thing, But I’m not sure this is the best way forward,

So he came! Did you? And did he go down on you? This is a set up where you both know what each other wants. As a healthy woman you have needs. But make sure you communicate those needs.

Casual sex should still be quality passionate sex. This does notvsound to have been at the throws of passion.

Yes, he did go down on me and yes I came, before we moved to PIV.

We’re meeting again tonight so hopefully there will be less nerves this time.

Well done for using a condom.

Good luck for tonight

I too am inexperienced- what is PIV?!
Was round 2 any better? Which site did you use - I think I need to get out there!!

PIV = Penis in Vagina.

Sounds goiod OP and he appears to be doing his job. Don’t worry about a tiny blip.

‘Hope the second celebration was lovely.

@menopausalcraziness piv is a Mumsnet acronym for penis in vagina ie penetrative sex.

I used fabswingers, which I’d seem recommended here. Don’t be put off by the name, it’s not just for swingers!

But, it’s not for the faint-hearted. I actually deleted my profile after 24 hrs as I found it too much. As a woman on it you get bombarded with messages, literally popping up faster than you can read and either reply/delete. Some of them were very aggressive in content and manner, and a lot of the men on it had a sense of entitlement and would send repeated and sometimes abusive messages when I didn’t reply quickly enough for them. I had no profile pic up and put the bare minimum on my profile and even still I was getting hounded- that’s in no way meant to be a stealth boast, these guys are just firing off messages to every woman in their locality, but it just gives you an idea what to expect. A lot of them were expecting to meet that night and some talking about riding bareback, ffs. Very possibly messers who had no intention of meeting, but unpleasant nonetheless.

If you join it, be safety conscious. Meet in public place first, etc etc etc. I’ve no doubt there are plenty genuine people on it but you can’t be too careful.

Good luck!

@starlight
Round 2 was definitely better, less nerves more relaxed etc!