Gorilla grunts

[Dream19]

New man, first time dtd this week. Stayed over so it happened more than once.

He is a lovely guy and easy to talk to. We have an incredible physical attraction and the sex was incredible except for the fact that he grunts really loudly, just like a gorilla sounds.

I’m a bit surprised by this and find it a bit off putting. I was with my ex for a lot of years and he was fairly silent so I’m not sure if this is less unusual than I think?

I love the fact that he is into it and is probably enjoying himself a lot but I wanted to laugh at one point.

The thing is I have an older teen at home and although she knows I’m dating this man I feel like he could never stay over at mine due to the volume of the sound effects

Is it ok to talk to him about this? Its not my place to tell him how vocal he can be but at the same time it could be really embarrassing. What is the best way to approach it? I don’t want to give him a complex.

I stayed at his place the first time for clarification.

What you could do - instead of directly referencing it (because I appreciate that.it's a bit awkward), if you do stay at yours, you could just say 'we'll both have to try to keep our passions on the low side because my daughter will hear' and that should be enough. He might not even need telling if he knows that other people are in the house but it would put your mind at rest. You certainly would not be out of order to raise the issue but at least this way you wouldn't be specifically mentioning his particular noise!

you could just say 'we'll both have to try to keep our passions on the low side because my daughter will hear'

No, seriously, do not risk subtlety. That could mean: don't make the bedframe bang. Say: "You make a lot of noise when we have sex. You need to be much quieter here.' Leave no ambiguity.

I say that as a man.

Fair enough - might be a little subtle!

I could see how that could be quite off putting for some. Sometimes you just need relative quietness just to focus

I associate people being quiet during sex with those who first started sexual relationships in their bedrooms as a teenager, trying not to alert the parents.

I'm very vocal during sex and I expect my partners to be the same. I find silence really off-putting. How the fuck am I supposed to know if I'm doing the right thing if I can't at least hear how quick you're breathing?

That said, I did fuck one guy once who made a groan like a mortally-injured rhino when he came. I had to ask him if he was okay.

Anyway as a PP said, if it gets to the point where he stays at yours and sexy times are on, just say "We need to be quiet or my daughter will hear us, okay?" You could put your hand over his mouth if he starts getting carried away, that can actually be really sexy.

Think I need to hear this 😂

From my experience people who have not had children are noisier in the sack than those who have.

@StarlightLady HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I know right?