I've never had good sex

[ApplesAndPearsStairs]

I've had 7 sexual partners over the years (I'm early 40s) but, with the exception of the 3 ONS or 2NS that I had, there was something wrong with the other 4 longer term sexual partners. My first boyfriend (1.5 years) had erectile dysfunction, second boyfriend never came inside me ever (3 years), third boyfriend had some kind of foreskin strangulation issue, last partner has PE. I have never had a normal sexual relationship. Am I unreasonable in thinking that I got unlucky and to hold out for another more satisfying sexual relationship? Or is it quite common for men to have these problems and I just need to suck it up and not expect any more? Thanks.

Anyone? Am I expecting too much?

I don't think you are alone, or wrong for wanting good sex and I'm sure most people could list a string of partners where things haven't been ideal, both ways.

Personally, I've only had one partner where all boxes were ticked, with the added bonus of frequent mutual orgasms from just PIV, it was my first partner actually and I didn't know any different so thought that was normal as it was just like on TV. I soon learned. LOL

Since then there's been those who won't give oral, vaginal dryness, low libido, only with the lights off, can't orgasm, only want one position, selfish and think men don't appreciate foreplay, near silent, unenthusiastic - thankfully not all in the same partner!

I almost wish I'd not had the experience I had with my first, as ever since, sex has disappointed as I know how it can be. Just a shame she was a loon.

I think finding a sexual partner that you a fully compatible with without some kind of 'issue' is a rare thing indeed, at least in my experience, and yours too by the sound of things.

Sounds like just bad luck, keep trying

I’ve had a few sexual partners (around 30 I think) including a woman and only now (at 45) do I have amazing sex. It’s like a whole new world!! Don’t give up.

I’m sorry to hear that your happy successes have been limited. I am a little older than you and had significantly more bed friends. I think that is why I have been luckier, so don’t let poor experiences put you off.

Have you considered moving the emphasis away from penetration? In more recent times, I have had several friendships which have begun on an oral only basis. Only when we have settled into that for a week or so have we moved on.

It’s a little awkward to raise when getting near the knickers off stage for the first time but it dies have significant benefits. It also seperates those who will be happy to go down on you early on.

Best widhes. x