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Not finishing?

13 replies

hatty1993 · 12/01/2019 18:04

Hello! Basically long story short I slept with someone for the first time last night and he didn't finish? So now I'm feeling really paranoid that it was because of me and what if he didn't enjoy it, he said he did but I can't help but feel really self conscious now. I'm usually very confident but this has knocked me! Am I being ridiculous, is this normal in some men? We had been drinking so I'm hoping that's the only reason. Can anyone shed some light, can men enjoy sex without finishing?

OP posts:
SnoogyWoo · 12/01/2019 18:14

A lot of men have to feel totally at ease with the person to let go so to speak. It won’t be you and it will be preying on his mind.

I am a man and it’s happened to me but the next time was fine. It’s the performance pressure as well.

It really won’t be you or he wouldn’t have gone to bed with you in the first place. He will think you are amazing.

hatty1993 · 12/01/2019 18:22

@SnoogyWoo thank you so much for your reply, I'm pleased to hear it probably won't of been because of me. I just feel like I won't of pleased him now and worry he won't be interested in me anymore!

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SnoogyWoo · 12/01/2019 19:26

Definitely not you Hatty. I am sure it’s the same for you, the first time is full of worry, anxiety and excitement. All of those emotions make it a bit harder to let go and cum.

Flatbellyfella · 12/01/2019 19:45

IT is not you, lots of men can go hours & not Finnish , that does not mean they don't enjoy it, ED can cause this if they take Viagra type of drug.

StarlightLady · 12/01/2019 21:07

Shakespear re drink and men: “It provokes the desire but it takes away the performance”!

It’s not you at all. Equally, it’s important for him not to feel bad about it all. Stay relaxed and keep practicing with him. I assure you he is feeling a lot worse than you. Treat it like somone having a cold, they get better.

hatty1993 · 12/01/2019 21:41

Thanks so much everyone. Hopefully next time it will happen, maybe we'll have to try sober sex see if that helps. Is it likely he enjoyed it though without finishing?

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SirGawain · 12/01/2019 22:24

Starlight Lady You are right, as you probably know it's the Porter's speech in Macbeth and forms a comic interlude before the high drama of the murder of Duncan is discovered. As always Shakespeare is spot on in his analysis of human nature.

Wherearemymarbles · 12/01/2019 22:42

Hatty, i suspect a great many women dont finish 1st time or even 2nd/3rd time so quite normal. Also condoms dont always help.


Room4improvement · 12/01/2019 22:43

When this has happened to me its usually because I was concentrating more on making sure she was having a good time, by the time I got round to thinking about how much I was enjoying it I was knackered and didn’t have it in me to finish. Didn’t mean I did not enjoy it!

AloneLonelyLoner · 13/01/2019 14:46

My partner can go hours without coming and usually doesn’t. He does definitely enjoy it. It’s just one of those things. I’ve decided this is the case with a lot more men than is usually reported. It’s not just women who don’t come. Also when I don’t come I still usually love the sex so I figure it’s the same. Try not to worry.

hatty1993 · 13/01/2019 22:29

@AloneLonelyLoner thank you, it's a good way of looking at it cause I don't always finish but still enjoy so thank you.

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Chocolatecoffeeaddict · 19/01/2019 10:19

I once had a partner a few years back who was 12 years older than me. He could only rise to the occasion sometimes and when he did he rarely had an orgasm. He seemed to have a generally low sex drive.
I remember feeling low about it as I thought it was me, but he told me he was always like this and caused the breakdown of his marriage. Ultimately, we didn't last because it was too much of an issue for me.

SkinnyPete · 19/01/2019 11:17

I'd put a bet on him having wrestled his meat before potentially DTD to avoid any accidental PE issues. Common male tactic I'm afraid. And as everyone else has said, booze can kill it too. Fortunately for you he didn't get whiskey dick too Smile

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