Sex not so important?

[Newman2018]

So I’ve been in a loveless and pretty much sexless marriage for years now. We are close to separation and I’m wondering if there is anything left to salvage.

Whilst discussing sex, my wife has finally admitted that sex is not so important to her nowadays. It kind of is to me though - surely it’s the one thing to bond a couple together - intimacy (both emotional and physical) being key to a healthy relationship??

Anyone make this situation work?

Someone suggested I discuss an open marriage and I finally plucked up the courage. Not something she could do apparently.

I have kids I love but my happiness is important too. I’m just interested to hear thoughts from others in or who have been in this situation.

I am in the same situation & making plans to leave.

It's been over 6 years now & I can't ever see us being intimate now. Nor do I want to (he has depression, mostly bad-mooded, in all likelihood had an affair & doesn't pull his weight at home).

Nothing want with wanting a sex life. If she really doesnt want to thats her choice but you wouldn’t be at all unreasonable for leaving.

It would be reasonable for you to leave. Have you talked about this with her? If she's been low libido for a while, or never had much of a libido, then she might have trouble empathizing with you. Why give up a good marriage over such an unimportant thing as sex? But you need to stick to your guns, sex isn't unimportant to you or to most adults.

If your marriage is loveless what is there to salvage? I was in a loveless marriage for the best part of 10 years. I would have said the same as your wife regarding sex. It was only when I met somebody new and it was like flicking a switch back on that I realised that yes it is important and how much I'd missed that passionate connection.

I’m shocked at the kind of protracted, awful scenarios people tolerate. With regard to the OP, move on with dignity. You may find another, more suitable partner, you may not. Either way, you’ll be happier than you are now.

I don't think that many women don't like sex, it is usually an indicator of either their relationship or other pressures or unhappiness. Personally I don't think open relationships really help situations as although your wife may not want sex fr whatever reasons, I will be sure she won't want or cope with knowing you are having sex elsewhere. I have read on here occasions where some women turn a blind eye, often when older and can't face the disruption of divorcing but it doesn't mean they are happy.

I do think any marriage can survive with sex and the intimacy it brings. I have just commented on another thread with an OP wanting to revitalise things with her DH specifically in the sexual way and I think she is really tight and proactive in doing so as it can help stop relationships sliding to a point whereby it can't recover.

You need and honest discussion with your DW and see how things are wider. Maybe consider counselling but you may have to accept it is better you part than carry on being unhappy and not fulfilled as I'm sure she isn't being either

Sorry for the advice!

Sorry I meant to say ...I don't think any marriage can survive without sex and the intimacy it brings