I don't know why, I just never instigate sex. I have a high sex drive yet never instigate sex. I think I don't feel comfortable enough to instigate it as I'm too worried about rejection, although me and my partner have been together years. I'm so used to him instigating it, anytime, anywhere he wants. Yet I don't even instigate it in bed. I think I'm scared of being rejected! But I know he wants me to instigate it and be more daring!
We have arguments sometimes about the fact I never instigate it or do anything to turn him on, I have dressed up a few times. But with lack of confidence in doing so didn't go down very well and I just gave it and went to bed. How do you get your confidence up enough to instigate sex? To dress up etc?
We have had a good sex life in the past but lately it's going down hill and it is my fault. I'm making it boring, to the point now where he just has sex to cum. When he's drunk he puts so much effort into it that it's amazing and so do I, I want our sex to be like that constantly. I have more confidence when he's drunk, and when I am too. I am comfortable around him and with him so it's not that I aren't comfortable with him. It's more that I worry too much about doing the wrong thing or saying the wrong thing or being turned down. As sometimes he doesn't bother with sex especially when stressed. I'm even that bored of it being predictable now too that I aren't even bothered for sex much anymore.