What is wrong with me why doing I feel like this

[nowimsomeonenew]

Long story short my sex drive has dwindled to almost non existent in the last few years. Dh has quite high sex drive. With lack of sex drive I've also become quite prudey. Cant explain why at all. Last night DH asked me to use anal beads on him. He enjoyed it but today I'm feeling embarrassed and almost stressed by it. Just to add I have depression and anxiety if that makes a difference.

Are you taking anti-depressants or on any hormonal contraceptives? Certain types can zap your sex drive.

Did you enjoy using on him though? My ex-DH and I used sex toys on each other and it is simply about mutual consent.

Yes I am on anti-d, recently came off all hormonal contraception. It was just a sex act on him I wasn't participating (heavy period and pains). He enjoyed it and hasn't been concerned by it today. It's just my prudish thoughts that are bothering me. In general I'm a person who thinks if both parties agree etc then nothing is off limits, except for my own sex life. It's very hard to explain.

I think maybe repeating something a few times can help overcome a taboo.

Seems clear to me that these things will seem ridiculous if you're not at all aroused.

So you were in pain and not in the mood at all but your dh was more than happy to still let you give him pleasure. That would not sit well with me at all. I’d only be doing sexual things with my dh if we were both in the mood.

Nothing really wrong with you, it's normal to feel a bit.. "eugh" after certain sexual things if you're not in the mood. Sex is pretty icky to be fair. If it was consensual and you were OK with it at the time, no harm, no foul, but you don't have to pretend pulling beads out of your bloke's bum is all fluffy clouds and rainbows.

I imagine he might want to give it another go though, as once you pop, you just can't stop!

So you were in pain and not in the mood at all but your dh was more than happy to still let you give him pleasure. That would not sit well with me at all. I’d only be doing sexual things with my dh if we were both in the mood

Come off it

No where in the OPs post or replies did she say she was pressured into anything. She could’ve said no if she didn’t want to!

DP and I usually have sex when I’m on my period however day 1 and 2 the cramps are often too painful. I still happily do stuff to him! Just because I’m not in the mood for full sex doesn’t mean I don’t want to do anything sexual at all.