Porn

[IknowIWBUbut]

So basically I went onto Google Chrome last night. My usual internet browser didn't support a website I was on and directed me to Chrome. I then discover that I can see my DP's history on there. (I researched why and because he has been using my Gmail his Google Chrome internet browsing is syncing to my Google Chrome! I am going to tell him so he can switch to his own gmail of course).

Anyway now to the bit that I really shouldn't have done.. I had a little browse and I came across a few bits I wish I didn't.. such as "bad attitude blowjob", "[celerbrities name] blowjob". DP loves blowjobs so it came as no surprise that he was searching for that content specifically.

However, I am happy to and enjoy giving DP oral but knowing he has been satisfying himself to other women doing that makes me feel a bit repulsed. Is that dramatic of me?

The bad attitude stuff has bothered me as well. I read that and immediately thought of a scenario where a woman has an "attitude" and is then punished with a blowjob. Dyswim? He has never made me feel forced into giving a blowjob, is very hands off and sits back and relaxes so it really surprised me. It also made me think if that's a fantasy of his why does he not discuss it with me and see if I'm keen to act it out?

So basically do I ONLY admit that I have access to his history so he can use his own gmail? Or do I also mention that I crossed a line and browsed his history which I'm sorry about and then mention what I discovered?

Or do I just pretend I never saw what I saw and not read into it too much?

Sorry I know this may seem quite dramatic but it's playing on my mind and I don't want to cause a problem with DP if it really isn't warranted. I feel very torn about it atm.

I know IWBU to browse his history and I do feel really bad about it.

Oh if this is relevant I haven't noticed a change in our sexlife and I don't feel that it has been affected.

Thoughts please? And thank you.

Wouldn’t worry too much. From my understanding of your description of his search, it probably indiactes that is turned on by sub/dom sex, which is fairly common, and for many people that is in the form of someone being ‘forced’ into performing a sexual act. The reality (in most cases) is that the participants are consenting with a prepared safe word.

As for him not telling you, it’s not always easy to bring up your sexual kinks in a conversation due to embarrassment of liking anything beyond vanilla sex. Providing that you don’t have a problem with the stuff he likes, he may actually be pleased that you’ve come across his browsing history so that he no longer has to be secretive about it and can talk about what you might want to get up to in the bedroom.

Thanks Joey7t8 for the great response.

I will mention it. I just have to decide the best way to bring it up without embarrassing DP now!

I would be horrified if DP did this

What I do in my own time with my own body and to what video is down to me. I would feel incredibly invaded if DP snooped and had a problem with it

Luckily he doesn’t and knows porn is porn and it’s just fantasy. And it’s the same for him. He watches porn, I couldn’t care less what he’s watching as long as 1) it’s legal obviously, and 2) it has no negative effect on our sex life. Which it doesn’t

You disliking porn because of him watching another woman is down to your own insecurity. Expecting your partner to change something simply because you’re insecure is unfair. He will see hot women almost every day of his life. Besides in porn it isn’t so much about who the woman is it’s more so the act. Once he’s finished and shuts off the video he probably doesn’t give it another thought

I think you’re being unreasonable and I would be fuming if my partner snooped. What’s worse - him having a quick wank over porn when you’re not around or you invading his privacy and complaining about what you’ve come across?

I know what I’d finish a relationship over..

Oh and I’m sure you won’t embarrass me. He’s done nothing to be embarrassed about! Nothing embarrassing about porn

The only one who should be embarrassed is you for snooping on him and invading his personal stuff

Him not me

Calm down Chippyway, yeah?

chippyway I think you've only picked out certain parts of my post but thanks for the response nevertheless.

Hi
I've only read quickly but I'd say try and chill .
Fantasy is just that, and that's okay .... but not usually played out to or with the one we love .
We all self indulge sometimes and you just got a snippet of that ... I'd say just don't look and trust him . Sounds like a decent chap .

Thanks tinkerbell. I did discuss it with him and like a pp said he did actually open up a bit more about acting out fantasies which was great.

I've had a few chats with him about fantasies before but he never shared anything which is why I was worried about embarrassing him by mentioning it. But I'm glad I did and I'm really happy with the outcome of the conversation.

Mention nothing about discovering his web history. If you want to have more honesty about fantasies in your relationship, then I suggest you visit mojoupgrade.com

Oh mate. Get a grip. I watch all kinds of porn I’d not do in rl.

It's not really about getting a grip Wallissimpson2. It's about learning to not make a connection between porn and myself which was difficult at first because I don't watch porn and therefore didn't go into this with an open mind.

He needs to be attracted to women in general in order to find you attractive.

Similarly you need to be attracted to men in general to find him attractive.

Really? You all think there's nothing problematic at all about OP's husband being turned on by watching women be punished through oral sex?