Sex if he doesn’t ejaculate

[littlepill]

New partner has 0 sperm count, not an issue - both divorced with kids. He is on testosterone supplements. Sex is fantastic so far and we communicate well, but still not discussed few things.

• it goes on forever! Very nice indeed, but does it just stop when we get tired? Seems so strange as usually ex had premature ejaculation, kind of opposite problem.

Does anyone else have a partner with this problem?

Sounds like he's experiencing delayed ejaculation, sperm only makes up a small part of the ejaculant.

As above. Sperm count has nothing to do with male orgasm and ejaculation. Men that have had vasectomies still produce the usual volume.

Yes, to clarify, he is experiencing both...

Low speed count and so is taking testosterone. I think testosterone is causing delayed/no ejaculation...

How do people get on in their sex lives, in this case?

He hasn’t had a vasectomy. Thinks problem has occurred with aging, he is mid 50s.

*Low sperm, not speed!

Why is he taking testosterone for low sperm count when it doesn't sound like you're trying to conceive?

Retarded ejaculation. DH had this due to medication. TBH I did struggle with it - I almost never orgasmed with him either (happened once) so neither of us did!

In theory it should have made us really good communicators and there were times when it liberated me to stop chasing after his orgasm or my orgasm and just do what felt good and stop when we'd had enough. But other times it was difficult, it all felt a bit pointless sometimes and I felt really guilty masturbating.

Budesonide He is taking it for hypogonadism rather than for the low sperm count

annandale Thank you for sharing this. Yes, I think it might be due to his medication. He didn't tell me until first time we were in bed, so although I did have a (very nice!) orgasm, I asked him if he was close and he told me then...

We are good communicators but as it's early days, I'm wondering how it might pan out... How to know when to stop! In conversation about how many times we did it in one night, he said he doesn't think in terms of 'how many times' but about enjoyment, which makes sense.

It just feels so weird to be with someone who doesn't cum!

Thank you for this frank post. I am interested in how it might go. It does feel sort of liberating, but I think I will miss 'that moment' when a man is at his peak... he does seem to get to peak pleasure, but the expression of that is different.

Maybe I'm overthinking it!

Isn't that what women want? Men who can go on and on?

No idea howling, haven't asked them.

On sex threads here it does seem as if people assume whatever they like is what everyone likes, or conversely that they are special and weird for doing something it turns out half of MN are doing. There is always someone who shyly reveals they only come by riding their partner's leg, and is a bit surprised to find this is totally normal. Or someone who likes 'on and on' and someone who likes 'a quickie' who then find out they are talking about exactly the same length of time. I've heard the MN sex board described as joyless, but to me it's one of the most valuable places on the site. The fact that you can be struggling and unconfident, or limited and quite happy, and post here, is genuinely liberating.

Amen to that.

Thank you for this - it's a really interesting topic. This board goes through bouts of diversity, I agree. For me, it's between-people but also within myself. Howling I agree, sometimes it is rather fun to have a lover who can go on and on and on, especially as he is a kind, considerate, attentive man. Multiple orgasms are fabulous ( remembers no name change!). However, like Annandale the experience can be a bit tricky. I rather liked it when a previous ex came over me (oh goodness, no NC recalled!!). Didn't like it much when he insisted on other things...

What am I asking? I guess.. how to demarcate the sexual experience if there is no ejaculation. In previous men it seems a crucial point of the sexual episode Or so I've been told! Or was it more like pride at being able to make the woman orgasm? I can't work it out. The sex is good, currently, he is great, but I am concerned about whether we can err keep it up in the long run. It can be time consuming!

Would be interested in hearing anyone else's experiences....