Losing my HL being with LL DP

[needanivoftea]

I'm late 30's and my DP is early 40's. We've been together nearly 5 years, don't live together.

The issue is that I used to have quite a high libido and would initiate all the time, give BJ's with nothing in return but I started to get resentful and stopped and now we're at a point where we only have sex twice a month. We've had talks about it, the last one being in Jan, and I told him that I couldn't live the rest of my life like this, we went away for the weekend, had sex every day, came back and it went straight back to the twice a month.

I just don't know what to do now. The last talk was basically an ultimatum so our next one will be we break up? It makes me so sad because in every other way, he's great and we are so compatible but my self esteem is slowly getting eroded and I can't force him to desire me/want to have sex.

Not really sure what the point of this post is but don't have anyone else to talk to.

Is it worth reminding him of your talk in January?

Tbh i couldn't put up with this and wouldn't have lasted five years, sex is too important in my relationship.

Ok, so what is it about home that makes him not want sex? It's obv not you!

Does he get distracted by things to do? Does he feel nervous you'll be interrupted? Is the bed uncomfy? Is it the weight if exoectation? Getting up the next morning for work, not pleasure? Is he getting depressed at home?

I dunno, but unless it's pure idleness and ease seeking it sounds like there's something in his mind..

Bin him off. He;s managed to "make an effort" in an attempt to save your relationship but it's pretty clear you have mis-matched sex drives.

I could of written this op hope it's all ok I know how fustrated you feel