How to evolve?

[vanillaevolver]

Have NC for this.

My DH just told me that I am very vanilla. I had never even heard of this term and didn't have many partners before him (otoh, he was a bit of a 'lad'). (So suppose it is true, and I have led a sheltered sex life!)

To clarify, he was not being derogatory, he says he is very happy with our sexlife, but after 15 years (and this comment), I am starting to feel a little
bored and wondering how to spice it up.

I have no idea where to start and don't feel comfortable asking friends in RL.

Please can someone point me in the direction of information or offer guidance?

You could start by finding a way to spice it up that you both like the sound of. Talking and imagining is the first bit.

Think about your fantasies and what turns you on, talk about it with your partner. Perhaps if he is more experienced the might be things he has tried in the past that he might like to introduce you to?

The board game Monogamy (we bought from Lovehoney) is a fun, fairly gentle, place to start.

Ask him. Ask him what he wants. Discuss it.

I've heard good things about mojo upgrade which is an online quiz you both do.

Love honey website

I don't think dropping it in to conversation (that you're 'vanilla') is a very nice thing to do.

Worst fucking term ever and it's only twats who think they invented sex use it anyway

"So then dh what master tricks have you come up with?!"

Yeah - he want's kink. That's a BDSM term. Check out what porn he has been googling...

There will be something specific behind that remark. Some fetish that he wants to try. Guarantee.

Worst fucking term ever and it's only twats who think they invented sex use it anyway

Some truth in that; it is always used in a pejorative way.

We didn't invent sex but we may have improved on it ;-)