No kissing

[user1466108618]

Hi just wondered if no kissing during sex is normal? Been with my other half just coming up 16 years, sex was good at the beginning but now we are lucky if its once a week but when we do theres no kissing involved and feel i feel used afterwards my oh doesnt seem to have a problem with this. Any advice?

I don't know the answer but, would feel the same. Kissing is awesome & it seems odd that he won't

I wouldn't like it

Get him to watch pretty woman. I would hate this, kissing is wonderful.

I don't think no kissing is usual. It implies a lack of intimacy. I wouldn't like it.

I agree with pp a lack of kissing feels like withholding intimacy. I would feel like a prostitute.

Has he always been like this, or is this a change in behaviour?

No real advice op sorry. Relationships without kissing and especially during sex is not my cup of tea, I just wouldn't feel any intimacy or passion with that person.

Did you used to do it as a couple? Maybe the sparks gone out a little bit or you need to tell him it's what you want/need to feel close to him.

Do you kiss at any other times?

Is there a breath issue?

I don't know how to say this politely, so I shall just say it. Is he used to sleeping with prostitutes? Normally they don't do kissing and if that's what he has effectively learned, it could be why he behaves like this, it's how he automatically behaves.

Anyway, as you can see, this would be my assumption.

Does he have poor dental health that he might be embarrassed about, or do you?

Some people aren't fussed about kissing, I can take or leave it and I don't use prostitutes.

Maybe he's just got a bit lazy if he knows the OP misses that part. Has it been raised?

I dont particularly like kissing either i can take it or leave it during sex I don't think that it means a lack of intimacy. However if it bothers you then bring it up you only get what you want in life by asking!

If for some reason (like cold sores) there's no kissing then there's no sex for us. Kissing is awesome.

Are you talking about kissing before sex as a part of foreplay or during actual sex?

If its the former, yes that seems odd. If its the latter, well me and partner never kiss during. Ok maybe a bit of neck nibbling but no snogging, ever!!

Thanks for the replies yes it has been raised but then he blames me, our sex life has dwindled the last few years so barely not at all. There is no dental issues and i have commented about Pretty Woman and feeling like a prostitute. I did find pictures of a naked woman on his laptop so dont know if its connected and ive caught him on porn over the years which he denies! He will give me a kiss when leaving for work and thats it really.

Maybe its got to the stage where he is role playing the relationship rather than having/living it?

What's he actually doing instead? Staring at you? Anyway, very odd, imo.

I hate kissing dh.

I've just left a 10 yr marriage because I love kissing but my stbxh was awful at kissing! Now I'm having fun going out and kissing a few frogs!!

Why demented?

I used to really dislike kissing my STBEXH during sex, because he was quite stocky and if he lay on top I couldn't breathe. So I felt completely suffocated with kissing.

Then after I found him trying to cheat with other women on sex hook up sites I tried really hard to have the sex we used to have pre DC but the kissing felt far too intimate and I ended up turning away as much as I could to avoid it.

It's hard to explain but I felt he'd taken my money, my dignity, my happiness and my trust. He wasn't going to take the last thing I could hold for myself.

So it became functional businesslike sex just to stop the whinging.

My new DP -I could kiss all day, even with risk of beard graze.

Why don't you take the bull by the horns and just start kissing him? In the kitchen or while watching the television. Sometimes an old habit needs a little kick start.