Sudden (and massive) increase in sex drive

[HappyAsASandboy]

I did know whether to post this in relationships or here, as it is somewhere between the two.

I think I'm looking for other people that this has happened to so that I don't feel totally strange, and I am definitely looking for advice on how to cope with this within my relationship with DH.

I have been married for nearly 10 years and have three small children (youngest now two). Sex has been very infrequent since kids (maybe 4 times a year, with none during pregnancy/first year) and to be honest wasn't very frequent before kids either. I just didn't have a high sex drive, and DH learnt to cope. I always thought he'd like more sex that he was getting!

I'm the last two months my sex drive has gone through the roof, and for the last week has been all-consuming. I can't think of anything else and spend all my time plotting when I might get an hour to be alone

I have no idea where this has come from, but it is distracting me from normal life to the point I am not getting things done at home and at work. It is also freaking my husband out somewhat, though he's trying to be accommodating. I have spent the last week watching sensual porn to learn how to masturbate, having never been very successful with that before. This has helped because I can deal with some of this on my own now, and has also increased my confidence so that when we do have sex it is vastly better than it was.

But I still have the problem that I distracted and obsessed and spending too much time thinking about sex. And I still have the problem that my husband is struggling to keep up and is perplexed about where this has come from (as am I, but I kind of don't care!).

Anyone else been through this? What on earth has happened to make me so obsessed? And any ideas on how to gently bring my husband along after him spending 10 years 'ramping down' his sex drive

Any advice or similar experiences?

It shouldn't be that difficult to persuade your husband to be more active.
What does he like? What gets him going? You need to find his trigger point & pounce on it. No pun intended. Whether it be tie & tease, waking him up with a "special alarm", or something vanilla like anal play, or new lingerie, he'll have a tipping point. Good luck OP

You make it sound so simple! It feels hard to find the tipping point when things have been so quiet for so long.

Has anyone else suddenly gone from zero sex drive to off the scale in a short space of time?

I did following a miscarriage. It was very shortlived but I literally had a few days when I was beside myself thinking about sex. It was clearly hormonal. Sounds like it is worth a check up at the doctors, although I can imagine this is likely to be mortifying! Unless you can think of anything that might have tipped your homones out of their normal balance?

Worth a trip to GP in case, enjoy it in the mean time!

DP will catch up- the more you get the more you want so he'll come round to it, lucky chap.

I did shortly after hitting 41 and it got unbearable. I'm assuming it's summick to do with the slope downwards fertility wise and hormones going a bit wonky, a latch ditch attempt at babies.

Don't know the solution other than b vitamins and a rabbit though.

Me! I am 38, and my relationship had been terrible with me Ex (21 year relationship, i left him 1 month ago). In the last year or so my sex drive sky rocketed. I took that as trying to salvage a terrible relationship with sex. It didn't work.

Since I left him i have never felt so horny. My moving in present was a new rabbit.

I read somewhere its like your bodies way of telling you to procreate as your running out of time, I hope that isnt the case and menopause is a long way off. Enjoy it :)

I'm 42 and exactly the same thing. I spend waaaay too much time thinking about sex or watching porn (the latter of which I was never really interested in before). I'm constantly checking out guys on the street (usually somewhat younger than myself!). I'm glad you started this thread because I'd thought about it but was too shy!

Dunno if I could walk in to my (male) and GP and announce "I'm so Hornby, can you help?" though!

Hornby? Clearly my phone is trying to keep things clean!

God I hope for DPs sake this happens to me! Am 39, he would love me to start ravishing him.

I remember being so horny during my 20's. Frustrating at times tho. But much more fun than once at the weekend because you ought to. I miss my sex drive.

Mine went through the roof with the mirena coil

Hornby made me spit water across my laptop!

I have a mirena coil, I wonder if that was the start. I'm not complaining though, but now I am on my own I have a feeling I will end up doing something with someone I regret way too early after leaving a LTR. Thank god for the rabbit ;)

pudding Yep, me too - I need some time out but I do think 'how much longer do I wait?!' Nearly made a bit of an error of judgement with my neighbour the other week....

The only time I felt like this was when I was pregnant with my DD, though not at all with my DS.

Test?

This happened to me when my thyroid was overactive but you'd have other symptoms like weight loss

Weight loss and the horn?

Sounds like my idea of heaven!

(Disclaimer-that was lighthearted, I don't want to make fun of anyone's health conditions and know thyroid issues are shitty).

It was fun initially but then I got really spotty greasy skin. And I was ravenous for food too, spending money like no tomorrow, booking holidays, buying new clothes, being spontaneous...

I'm not like that at all when I'm euthyroid - I'm really boring.

And more poor husband was exhausted...

My poor husband not more

I'm glad to hear I am not the only one! But I am still finding it frustrating and distracting and so time-consuming Whilst it is nice to want sex sometimes, being physically aroused for the majority of the day while at work without my husband is not nice at all!

As others have said, I'm not sure I can manage a GP visit for this, at least not yet.

Those that have been here before me, how long did it last?

Excuse me for posting here. My wife recommends kegel balls they will keep you aroused through the day. Also, We-Wibe do toys that have a remote control that can be operated by an app. So he could be at work, you could be 20 miles away and he can literally make you orgasm on demand.

This is me! Am early 40sand went from regular sex to wanting it alll the time ! Must be summat to do with menopause? Am on antidepressants so doubly weird .

That's the point steve we don't WANT to be aroused most of the day. It's not fun.

Imagine yourself with a hard on that won't go away all day. I'd hazard a guess it would piss you off after a bit

I'm pretty good at orgasming on demand (obviously when appropriate, ie not on the school run/in front of DS/in the supermarket). And I'm single! I think it's more of a question as to WHY?