Cold sore and sex

[Yummymummya]

My husband currently has a cold sore he gets one around every 6 months. He's very strange when he has one. Won't kiss my cheek and won't have sex. It's just on his lip so it's perfectly possible to have sex. Is this normal and reasonable behaviour? It has now been 10 days since we last had sex after which he got the cold sore .. just interested to know what others do/think.

They are highly infectious and I think he is being very respectful to do this. I suffer from cold sores and wouldn't kiss. I wear patches during the day so that my baby and toddler don't accidentally come into contact with them. I have had sex whilst having one only with the patch on.

When I have a cold sore it's because I'm run down and feeling shitty. Sex would be the furthest thing from my mind.

They're really contagious and painful!

I've just had one and won't let DP go near me.

I don't want him to catch them and my lip is so swollen and cracked anyway - I can't imagine wanting to kiss someone!

Cold sores are very contagious.
Sex should probably be avoided until it has gone. It can transfer through oral sex too, which is incredibly painful...... Probably the most pain I have ever experienced.

It would be easy during sex to forget about the cold sore and kiss you. I think he's being quite sensible

Ok thank you. I am not a sufferer of cold sores so I don't know what is acceptable. I wasn't suggesting to kiss me at all as I know that it's highly contagious and I'm even paranoid about towels cups and sharing the electric toothbrush. But just a hug or a kiss on the cheek I think might be ok. I suppose it's just the complete lack of intimacy I find difficult due to a cold sore.

I think he's being very considerate. To not have sex, is the ultimate sacrifice

I sympathise with both of you. It's hard when you have a cold-sore because you feel crap and you don't want to infect your nearest and dearest. When you love the bones of your partner, it can be difficult to get physically close to them without wanting to take things further, so it can be easier to keep a safer distance.
I'm sure he could manage a hug though! I'd mention that, but show him some understanding about how he feels and some appreciation that he is being so careful.

TheNaze 'the ultimate sacrifice'?

I have a cold sore and I'm getting married in 2 weeks time! DP is on forehead only kissing just incase. I'm chugging vitamins in a bid to get my body a bit healthier and get rid of it before we leave for our eloping.

I get cold sores, I absolutely despise having them and would never want to pass it on to anyone else, so I would definitely not have sex with someone when I have one.
Not just because we wouldn't kiss...but just the risk would be to much.
I think he's just thinking about the risk of you catching the virus, so don't worry.

When mine flare up I get super stressed about the potential of infecting someone else. All physical contact stops and I even avoid opening doors with my hand in case I have inadvertently touched touched my face without realising.

It may well feel like rejection to you, and my DH, but if you suffered from them you would understand why he does this. I hope all his efforts at confining the virus to himself keep working.

I feel very tired and run down when I have a cold sore and very unattractive and unsexy. I almost need time to recover on my own and maybe your partner does as well.

I suffer with cold sores and avoid kissing and oral sex while I have one but I am happy to have sex and don't see why it would be an issue. Just do it from behind to make sure no one gets carried away to kissing.

Cold sores/herpes affects the area around mucus membranes (mouth, genitals, anus, eyes) and is passed on through contact with another mucus membrane. So keeping the affected area out of contact with other mucas membranes during a flare up is all that is necessary. It really shouldn't stop hugging, kissing or intimacy! - and lots of types of sex are fine - as long as there is no contact or a barrier (e.g. condom) between the affected area and a vulnerable part of the body.
Hope that helps?