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Original poster

He never cums...

37 replies

Plashley · 10/04/2016 19:43

He never climaxes! Says he's not bothered about it, that his climax is unimportant. He prefers the journey to the climax rather than the climax itself. I've never encountered this before. It makes it difficult for me though as he can carry on pumping away forever! We roll around, change position, take a breather etc but it's starting to annoy me a bit because I'll climax, often more than once but he wants to carry on! Lately it's been too much and I've just had to tell him 'enough'. He'd rather carry on. Sad It takes enormous effort to get him to climax. Is there an answer?

OP posts:
LisaRinnasLips · 12/04/2016 09:11

Taking a tongue in cheek comment a little too seriously there abed Hmm

UmbongoUnchained · 12/04/2016 09:13

Abed's right though. If it was a man saying that about a woman nobody on this website would find it funny.

LisaRinnasLips · 12/04/2016 09:20

But gamer didn't say 'pin him down and assault him' she didn't imply there was no consent Hmm lots of men love a finger up the bum and other items

UmbongoUnchained · 12/04/2016 09:24

ive never asked. Most dudes will say no if you ask

Yeah... Sounds very consensual.
If a bloke stuck his finger up my ass with out asking I'd probably knock him out.

Abed · 12/04/2016 10:54

If I made that comment about sticking a finger up my wife's bum without her consent I'd be torn to pieces, how is Gamers comment any different?

Oh it's okay because it's a female making that comment, joke or not Hmm

0phelia · 13/04/2016 15:42

I'm thinking it's "death grip" and he's embarrassed about it. If it is, he can "retrain" his body to be more sensitive but he needs to do this, not you!

DuckDuckDuck · 14/04/2016 22:19

My dh is the same.
Always has been. No porn...no drugs...no other issues.
Sometimes it happens sometimes it doesn't...he's not bothered and is having a good time so neither am I.
If sometimes it goes on for to long or if I have enough then I just say so and we stop.

wantmorenow · 14/04/2016 23:47

My man's the same. I was a bit Confused at first and was shocked suffering from bruised ego as I have quite a few notches in my bed post and hadn't met this before. But having talked it through and thought about it rationally it's not a problem at all.

He was sensitive to being criticised about it having been before and whether I would feel inadequate. He reassured me it wasn't down my sexiness or skills and that it was unlikely he would come in sex, bj's or even with his own hand but that he still loves sex and not bothered about coming. It wasn't about me, it's just the way he's wired. Once we 'ignored' his orgasm and I got used to focusing on mine it has been the most liberating sex ever. He'll go as long or as short as I like and I get to come often without worrying about getting too excited and him popping prematurely. I get to be very selfish. Luckily I enjoy giving him bj's and will happily suck away at him for ages whilst watching a movie or just snuggling up. Doesn't matter to me whether he comes or not actually quite nice not having gookyspunk to deal with I enjoy the sensuality of it.

Almost 2 years on he actually does come in oral now often, not every time but more than he has ever done so we're happy with that. Still no PIV orgasms for him but loads for me.

I wouldn't swap the sex we have now for any other way. The 'normal' way doesn't work as well for me as I get so engrossed in the man's orgasm that I don't have my own. Keep communicating with him and find your own 'normal', it's possible that given some new thinking he may be your best lover yet. Grin

Rockluvvindad · 16/04/2016 11:34

Gamer, I think I love you Grin

It might just be his age sad to say. As we get older the likelihood of ejaculation decreases...If he was always slow to cum when he was younger, then he will likely get worse. If it's recent, he should go and get a PSA check. The prostate is quite key in the whole process and one of the part affected by aging.

On that note, if he's agreeable, you could try prostate massage. That will almost certainly get him off. You can use a finger or a toy ( there are ones designed specifically for this ). That will cause an almost involuntary ejaculation if you do it right.

gamerchick · 16/04/2016 11:54

any man who stuck a finger up his wife's backside to make her cum is frankly doing it wrong Wink

annandale · 16/04/2016 13:45

erm... unless she said 'stick your finger up my backside, it makes me come'

Joystir · 27/05/2016 22:20

is he addicted to masturbation? if a man masturbates with a tight grip it can cause this- he doesnget enough friction PIV

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