Body confidence effecting libedo

[WhenSheWasBadSheWasHorrid]

Just wondering if anyone else is experiencing this. Or has any advice.

Kids are 5 and 2 1/2, I co slept with both of them and dh and I are finally getting some decent sleep. This has rekindled our sex life.

But after two kids my body confidence is at an all time low. I'm 5"7 and 11 stone so I am fairly heavy. Dh is really skinny.

I'm having a real issue with thoughts of feeling fat creeping in when we are having sex. Most of time I can banish these thoughts but just recently it's getting worse. And I wasn't able to climax the last two times.

I'm going back to the gym again (after a 5 year break ). But so far I'm feeling less confident not more.

Anyone else? Or any advice on how to feel more confident?

I don't think you are overweight given your height but I do understand how your perception of yourself is different. It's hard to switch from 'mother' to 'lover' and feel sexy, especially when your body has been through the mill of what is motherhood.

I recently started dating (I have 4DCs so have really been through it) and try hard to maintain that my body is pretty damn amazing in what it can do. I am fat, I know that. (Heavier and shorter than you). Try to think positively about your body. Accept it is different than it was before DCs - but for a bloody good reason. It is still yours and you are still amazing.

Practically try to get away from your family environment. It's such a cliche, I know, but new underwear, a night in a hotel with your partner. Spend some time taking care if yourself.

Have you talked to your DH about this? I bet he finds you incredibly sexy exactly as you are.

I watched a program with a woman in a similar position - they asked her to feel her stomach - and describe it - warm soft etc - and not at all gross

Have a feel!!

Thanks everyone. Dh is very sweet. I spoke to him and he's just baffled. Can't really understand why I feel this way.
I know he still finds me attractive, but he's not the sort to dish out compliments.

he's not the sort to dish out compliments.

Tell him you need him to change this habit, and this is how he can show his support for your current mental health blip.

Giving compliments (not necessarily about appearance) is its own reward. It engenders a new appreciation for the person/aspect you're complimenting. It's like doing daily gratitudes.