Bicurious but a bit lost

[Tickler10]

I have name changed for this. I split from my H at the beginning of 2015 after 16 years & two DC. Prior to getting with him I had been interested in women & had kissed a couple but no further. I thought it was a phase.

Fast forward to now & I'm finding that I am not finding men attractive in the slightest. In fact the thought of being with a man is quite horrifying. However, if I think about being with a woman I get turned on immediately.

I'd like to explore this a bit more but it terrifies me & I wouldn't know where to start. I have no gay friends, I'm the wrong side of 40, I live in a small village & don't go out much. Where the hell do I start?

I tried joining OLD a while back as woman looking for woman but got scared & closed down the account.

Any advice would be very welcome.

Don't give up on OLD right away. You might need to travel into a main city a bit to meet someone, so perhaps list wider locations on your profile?

Imagine if we had no internet. No dating / contact sites, poor OP would be stuck in her little village for the rest of her life wondering if she should make a pass at one of the neighbours.

Luckily the internet does exist and equally luckily there's sites available just for OP's very reason... :) Go on buddy, if you don't put yourself out a bit, you'll never find out will you?

Maybe you could join bi or gay meet ups. They have cinema, walking clubs, sports of all kinds, book clubs...This way you can meet other women and have a gentle introduction and when you are ready go for it.

OP, no need to be terrified Exploring your sexuality is a natural and exciting thing. There are loads of websites you could join. Try not to put any pressure on yourself. Go with the flow and enjoy.

You'll probably find that now you're becoming very aware of your attraction to women, that you'll be giving off a kind of vibe and I bet you notice you're noticed more. It's weird, but when I first started wondering, it was like I was wearing a "I think I like girls" sandwich board! I was used to being chatted up by men, but suddenly I was getting 'those' looks from women and also getting approached in a more than friendly manner. I found it fascinating, because I don't feel I was behaving differently at all, yet this was happening, so it must have been some sort of gay signal I was sending out, that only other gay\bi ladies can pick up It was very strange, but very exciting.

As I say, I was in your shoes a few years back- Am I? Aren't I? It hit me like a brick when I was first with my gf, that I most definitely am!!

Good luck.

You can be bi and go through phases of preferring one or the other :)

I met other women online, just easier to see who you get on with.

Try Her it's a dating app just for women seeking women and you can put yourself as bicurious and like women who you like the look of and if they like you back you can start chatting through the app.

You've nothing to lose! Not everyone on those things is a super experienced sex fiend, plenty will be like you.

Hi Tickler. I'm in the same boat. Just emerging from a traumatic relationship and the idea of another man fills me with horror! What has previously been fantasies is now possible - it's scary, but mid blowingly exciting too! I'm gonna feel the fear but do it 😱 - I think!!! 😄