Sleep orgasms

[Owlbefine]

I have name changed for this one.

Why is it that I have full on sleep orgasms (about once a month but more if I'm not getting enough) but I have only ever once had a PIV G-spot orgasm? (And that was about 15 years ago!!)

Surely sleep orgasms are controlled 100% by the brain, which suggests I have a psychological problem with having orgasms whilst awake - but only if my partner (which has been my DH for the last 11 years) is trying to make me come. I am pretty good at doing it myself, solo or in sex, but completely rubbish at having an orgasm if he is trying to make me come. How do I relax my brain in sex, to the point that I get to whilst asleep and have a normal orgasm whilst awake? And if we're doing oral, I get to the point that it's almost 'too much' and have to move onto PIV but I can't just tip over the edge. I'm considering seeing a sex therapist - can I really hit my 40s without this improving?

OMG, this is just too weird, have never been over to the sex topic, but came over to start a thread about having my first ever sleep orgasm early this morning! I struggle to have a full blown orgasm during actual sex but this was mind blowing. Sorry no help OP but wanted to share. I too struggle with the "tipping over the edge" in real life. I wonder if this is a thing??

I get these quite often, they are always fabulous!

I too struggle during PIV sex but can have them by other means quite easily. I can do it with PIV but only usually after I have already orgasmed. It's far easier 2nd time.

I don't have sleep orgasms but I do have spontaneous orgasms. They come from nowhere - not from any thoughts about sex. They build and are over in 10 seconds. They feel great and I don't understand them at all.
I don't have PIV orgasms either. I don't think they are completely psychological, I think they must be more physiological. It's almost like my body needs to orgasm, but that isn't sexual desire related.
Very odd but has never bothered me.

.

I had one the other night.

Woke up in a right state.

And the dream wasn't even that good!

The whole thing was very cervical : does that mean anything special?

Sorry OP just realised I didn't really answer your question.

I don't know. Maybe less clitoral, more g spot simulation? is the g spot even still a thing these days?

I have sleep orgasms, probably once every 6 weeks or so. I have no idea why, and they do seem to be less 'friction' based for want of a better description.

But then I also have plenty of orgasms during my usual sex life. So I don't think it's because of a lack elsewhere. They started maybe 5 years ago, in my mid twenties?

I've never had sleep orgasms but I thought not being able to come through PIV was more common than being able to ?

I certainly dont but more through his fingering after foreplay/whatever then I enjoy him being PIV but I dont expect to come from it. I may get rearoused etc.

I wonder if youre putting too much presure on yourself to come from PIV?

I sort of resent my subconscious having a better sexlife than I do.

I suspect that worrying about not being able to come in a particular way is one of the quickest ways to reduce the chances of it happening that way.

Yeah, I'm sure that PIV is one of the least effective ways of having an orgasm.

I have had these sleep orgasms but I find them a bit painful as they seem to come out of nowhere so there's been no build up to it. Definitely not as good as the awake ones! I Dont PIVO in real life.