OK, as a result of being a totally twit, DH has offered to have the base of his willy waxed.......
He has recently found out that his levels of testosterone are off the bottom of the scale, and is having injections to try and restore some normal level of function. In order to give himself some help, he bought a product called a bathmate.....
...it's a sort of hydraulic pump - no, not like the one Horse used in the film..
.. and is used to encourage the blood flow in penile blood vessels if that's the cause of the problem. So, not mucky at all. Honestly.
Anyway, the instructions said that the seal around the base would be better if the area were shaved, or otherwise hair free......
.....so he duly shaved.....and continued with injections etc....until the day came when he felt he was, ahem, up for it, so to speak.....
.....carried away by the moment after a rather long dry spell, it was only the next morning that I realised I had a stubble rash, probably similar to the effect that would be created by using the wire brush dedicated to Aga cleaning as a free alternative to Love Honey's best offerings......
....I duly renewed my wax casette for home waxing on DH's insistence - gave the bloke in the hairdressers/beauticians emporium a hell of a laugh...but this didn't work due to all the curved surfaces ...
....got my best tweezers out, cleaned my varilux glasses so I could see close up and went to work. Apparently, according to DH, plucking hairs out hurts.
....the next step is to search the 100sq m cellar, just in case a long-lost home electrolysis kit (with pads and gel, not the needle type) is lurking and still works.
So, DH sends a plea to any OH suffering from the same problem.....please, don't shave 'down there' or you could cause untold suffering to your DW, GF or DP, and end up volunteering for a comprehensive waxing session at the hands of an enthusiastic, but well-meaning amateur 