Am I shortchanging DP?

[OtisSpankmyarse]

Basically whenever we have sex I ask him not to finish inside me. If it's morning then I need to go to work, if it's nighttime then I hate sleeping in a puddle, but I just don't like it inside basically. I'm fine with the PIV shagging bit, just the mess at the end. We've been doing it this way for a few years and he's got quite good at whipping it out at the appropriate moment. It's not a contraception issue, and condoms are not an option. Have tried running to the loo after, but there always seems to be some left which appears when you least expect it! Occasionally he will ask if it's ok to finish inside me and that's fine I always say yes, it's different, more intimate I suppose. DP hasn't complained or anything, he says everything is fine, but still I wonder if I'm being fair or if he/we are missing out.

Dame - not gallons? Seems like it sometimes ...

Lulu - naughty naughty - now all of MN knows he's likely getting some action later and he has no clue

wally and lulu those are genuinely some of the nicest posts I have ever read on mn. I feel similarly to otis in that I'm not a fan of the aftermath but I do allow him to finish in me as I like the closeness. And yes, it's not gallons but it manages to hide up there and reappear at the most inopportune times! I tend to wear a pad after. But sometimes I feel like I smell conspicuously of sex . Does anyone else get that?

Yes but I like it.

yes Nabuma, I hate the smell , I would prefer condoms to avoid it.

Inconvenience or not, it's bloody well your decision as to whether you want someone elses bodily fluid inside yours. End of.

Well DH always hopes his luck is in and it hasn't been so far this week because he had an appendectomy last Friday.
Not to say he hasn't been trying to persuade me since Tuesday when he started to perk up - suggesting we could play Dr and patient because he thinks he needs a thorough examination to make sure everything is in working order. I laughed the first time at his optimism, and sent him to make us some breakfast instead the second time. DS fettled him the third time by waking up.
His latest bit of guff is I should definitely give in because it can't be doing him any good after an operation 'in that area' building up all this semen and the pressure when he finally comes. I think he might be about the link between his appendix and his balls.
But he does make me laugh.

Floaty, of course it's the OP's decision no one has said otherwise. I just questioned how much we are actually talking here , the way people are talking about it it sounds like the Niagra Falls the next day

Lulu - you make me laugh ... I'm sure it'll be lovely once you decide to stop torturing him :-)

Nabuma - thanks, I was beginning to think I was the only one who felt like this!

Floaty - it's not Niagra falls but it's enough to make me go , maybe I'm fussy compared to some, who knows. Of course it's my decision but a good sex life is about giving as well as receiving and I was worried I wasn't giving enough. Sometimes he asks if he can finish inside and that's fine, sometimes I'll ask him to stay inside, occasionally he gets the timing wrong or we get carried away in the moment and that's fine too. It's not a big thing really.

The only thing that matters is whether it works for you and your DH. By all accounts, you are both happy, so there is no short changing going on.

I wouldn't like it. I love the intimacy of him finishing inside me (most of the time). I've never found it a problem cleaning myself up afterwards.

Can I just add as an aside that yesterday morning, after my partner left I pulled back the duvet...and there was an exact impression of his man tackle on the sheet in dried fluids.

Like a penile shroud of Turin.

wally that's hilarious!

I've taken photographic evidence

Please don't share it

Oh no don't worry about that.

I don't like the mess much either.

However, for me it is a part of it and wouldn't want to spoil dh's fun by making him pull out.

We pretty much always have sex late at night (I mean when we have sex it is late at night, not that we have sex every night ;)) and I can't be arsed to shower. It isn't the most pleasant thing but I wouldn't want him to pull out either. It also feels very intimate to me as well.

Let gravity be your friend & go on top

Wally that's hilarious!

I do think some men produce a lot more than others, so if your partner tends to shoot a smaller load then it's not going to be an issue. My H didn't produce much so I didn't really have an issue there. My last ex could have put out a fire though

OK maybe not REALLY, but even after peeing, wiping and washing, then getting dressed, an hour later I'd cough or sneeze and a further gift would come out and go straight through my knickers and get my jeans/trousers wet

I think personally, if you are going to go swimming, you are going to get wet, but your body, your rules...